Secondary Trauma

My elderly, ailing mother is adopted & struggling with the rejection #trauma #primalwound #adoptee

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@ddgulledge @morcette @Birthlink100 I do - we have my Mum’s mother & father’s names & know that their son was also adopted. After that, nothing. A few leads were tried but it came to nothing.
I’m very sorry that you can’t access your info. It’s cruel & unnecessary

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

I always phone my Mum on Sunday’s. Her memory is getting worse. She will ask me numerous times about whether she should search again for her family. I will tell her that’s not my decision, yet again. She will say that her biological mum is probably long gone by now

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@morcette @Birthlink100 I hope that it went well with the half siblings. It must have been an anxious time xx

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@ddgulledge @morcette @Birthlink100 That’s a thing?! My god, how awful! I’m sorry that you can’t get your own biology. 🤬

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@CatTheresaUK @Birthlink100 Thank you x

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@morcette @Birthlink100 My Mum hasn’t done a DNA test but I’ve just ordered it☝️

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@morcette @Birthlink100 She’s in Scotland @Birthlink100 had been helping but then the search ground to a halt.

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@ddgulledge @Birthlink100 Thank you. I’ve just ordered one! I hope I’m doing the right thing by her. Thank you again

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@morcette Yes, she is & she has dementia 😢

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

I wonder if I’m on Twitter as I’m putting off calling my elderly mother with dementia. That makes me a crap daughter & it fills me with guilt

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@amanda_gick This makes me sad. The poor lad is showing how unhappy he is. I hope his parent can step up & help him. Perhaps less time writing about the child & more time given to him would be helpful….

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@saturdayobrien How awful! You seem like a very inclusive person to me who fights for people’s rights. I hope you’re ok

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

How can this upset still be allowed? My mum was adopted at 1 day old & she is stuck in a loop of desperation trying to find her family @Birthlink100

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

I will gently remind her that she is in her 80s herself so yes, she is probably long gone. My mum will then talk about finding any siblings & nephews & nieces. She will then forget the conversation & start it all over again

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@BootsChantilly I’m so sorry 💔

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

I’m not sure my Mum likes me very much. She loves me, without an doubt, but we are so different. I wonder if she if she wonders who I take after too

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

I am in my 50s. My Mum was adopted, she’s in her 80s now.
We are nothing alike. I have different colourings, I’m more outspoken, my hobbies are different, Mum’s religious, I’m agnostic. I take some parts of me from my Dad but I wonder if I’m like my maternal gran or granddad….

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

@LinaLeadsWLove My Mum never recovered from being adopted. She says she started her life in a home & will die on a home. I hope that the last part is not true

[Secondary Trauma @TraumaSecondary]

Why does society celebrate & applaud adoption & yet love it when there is a public reunion with the family that they were taken away from due to that adoption?

[sara h 🇪🇺 @lifeatthenest]

This is a difficult thread to write and maybe to read but recently, I’ve read some posts from women who have either had multiple miscarriages or failed IVF treatments. I can only imagine how difficult this is and they have my sympathy but when replying to these posts please…