Two In Progress

New mom of twins. Wife. CS PhD Candidate. Writing about motherhood, marriage, faith, research, and building a meaningful life in real time.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

September 1. I’m a 4th-year CS PhD, new mother to twin girls, and a person trying to make sense of research, ambition, marriage, and everything else competing for the same limited hours.

Starting a public notebook here: Two in Progress.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@Muse Being a mum is teaching me to research things instead of accepting them as they are. I almost paid $85 for a $5 problem because I didn't know enough to ask one question.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@Muse It didn't blink at all, which meant the key wasn't getting power.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@Muse Thankfully, the store owner had come around by this time and when I asked, he quoted me $5.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

The previous owner had told me that it would cost only a few dollars, so I knew something was off. I asked @Muse, who suggested checking whether the tiny light on the key blinks when I press a button.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

Remember my new car? The key battery died, so the buttons stopped working. I walked into a key shop to ask about getting it fixed, and the lady quoted me $85 to replace the board.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

I would recommend this book if you’ve ever softened feedback until it stopped being useful, or held back because you didn’t want to seem harsh. What’s the best piece of honest feedback you’ve ever received? 👇

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

“Being a boss is just a job, not a value judgment.” I’ve been thinking about this line all day. 🧵

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

The part that landed hardest: being a boss is a role, not a ranking of human worth. Giving or receiving hard feedback doesn’t mean someone is “above” or “below” anyone. Feedback from real care builds trust and strengthens professional relationships.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

Because on the hardest days, nothing matters more than a good-hearted person willing to walk with you through it all, all the way to the other side. ❤️

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

Today was my first coffee outing with a friend since becoming a mum.
☕

It felt so good to dress up, get out of the house with the girls, and catch up with someone who last saw me when I was happily newly married with no children.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

She asked me for marriage advice, and I honestly blanked. All I could tell her was to pray for a kind, thoughtful, and generous person.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@Maukeni_ Such a beautiful and thoughtful response 🥹 Thank you ❤️

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@Markmanson !! The friends I trust most are the ones who risked my anger. I'd question anyone who wouldn't. It usually means they care more about staying in my good graces than about who I become.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@OkadikeOnyeisi 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 because quitters NEVER win and winners NEVER quit!!

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@thedankoe This!! Consistency is the NAME of the GAME. Regardless of how much my responsibilities increase, I'm committed to keeping at least 3 disciplines, just to keep that muscle strong.

[Two In Progress @TwoInProgress]

@SahilBloom Though very true, it takes a really long time to come to this realization. The first few bad experiences can crush a person. But as you mature, you realize it could have been a lot worse, and it wasn't.