Cabin crew: Is there a Dr on board?
Me: I am a Dr
Cabin crew: Thank God. We have a question about the 18th century textile trade in Northern Africa
Me: Ah. I'm afraid my PhD is in the ceramics of Northern Europe, 1672 - 1701
@houstonpolice super cool that you guys kick out my Hispanic friend for a football game because a racist white family said a “dirty Mexican” was sitting by us. You ejected me from a game because a racist told another racist cop a dirty Mexican said “bad words” and I defended him
So my friend’s vet has a comfort-dog assistant that helps sick patients know that everything will be alright and this is really all you need to see today ❤️🐾
[first day as a mechanic]
customer: can i get a quote?
me: give me liberty or give me death
customer: i meant for the truck
me: oh sorry...autobots, roll out