Uber Duder

Riding dirty and writing clean (mostly). Book in the works on re-learning life and sharing the ride. Keep your $200—just don't puke. Also: @JasonLangendorf.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Uber's new drunk detection software has riders up in arms. But at least they aren't upchucking in my Sonata. https://t.co/xmzP52zB4G

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Moved to Nashville 3 months ago. Second night driving in the new car. Got divorce advice and a heap of leftover BBQ from a visiting Texan. Saw a killer band and met a prolific songwriter. Was offered $100 cash for a 6-minute ride, gave back $80 and let the dude house the BBQ.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Any Uber or Lyft coders or programmers out there? I’m convinced the apps are all but designed to screw over drivers. Someone who can explain the algorithms give me a shout. My DMs are open.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

@BryanMace5 @shock_hazard @KennethJOath @TakeThatDarwin @Fthedodgers1 @EdwardEvilap Replace “a scientist somewhere” with “God.”

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

How long does it take to connect with a rider? Four minutes. That’s it. Telecia and I chopped it up, figured it out, sorted it and wished each other well. “Enjoy that single life!” she said.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

@DonaldJTrumpJr They’re called regulation and infrastructure, Gomer, and the GOP has been happily ignoring both for years.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Anyhow, stay healthy and open to the world, Sal. Love and loyalty can be hard to find, but they’re out there.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Sending good vibes to my rider Sal. He’s had a rough go of it lately and clearly needed someone to talk to this morning. Step into my office/Uber, brother.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

“The dog’s an asshole. She doesn’t listen to me. But I’m happy to have something to share my home with.” Goddamn, if there isn’t a country song in there somewhere.

[certified certifier @YourBoyDrew]

imagine calling a helicopter Uber t for your girl, or your friend, or just drunkenly going home from the club like

[Dinn Mann @mooseoutfront]

Whatever you celebrate and for those who need a pick-me-up this holiday season, take comfort in this message: Jesus, apparently, has taken the wheel.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

@AWildCubone Yep. In my world, that passenger is immediately physically removed from the vehicle.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

@itsalbaby Pray to your one true god, Elon

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

Right on, brother. KIck rocks, assholes.

[Metrópoles @Metropoles]

Motorista de aplicativo da Pennsylvania expulsa passageira do carro após fala racista.

Ao ver o condutor, mulher disse “uau, um cara branco” e afirmou que o motorista era “uma pessoa normal que fala inglês”.

Após informar que não aceitaria a viagem, o condutor foi ameaçado.

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

@hodlorado You have the "freedom" to walk

[Uber Duder @Uber_Duder]

It's true, comrade.