Malindi

Professional diet chicken

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@missbeff I told them already, I’m so sorry 💔

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Next time I move to a different state, I’m going to adopt a charming accent. You have to do it when you first meet people, otherwise they get suspicious when you are suddenly British.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

This is so cool. What a good dog!!

[grace 🤝 @debtbarbie]

one time a woman with a medical alert wiener dog sat next to me on a plane and her dog kept alerting on me and she was like ��not to be weird but you should get your heart checked out” and that’s how i found out i had a mildly irregular heart beat

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@AliceinDCland I laundered Billie’s blankets and gave her her fancy @Greenies supplement and got zero appreciation, so I guess the usual.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@dbnarveson Can’t even tell you the number of times I’ve had a hard day and then buried my face in an enormous rainbow fish.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Every brand right now: Let’s making everything as visually boring as possible!! 👍🏻

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Here’s a pro tip: if you faint at the doctor, they give you free juice and graham crackers. With inflation that’s a $3-$4 value!

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

I understand that this inadequacy/excess dynamic applies in a lot of situations but this one in particular is maddening to me.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Incredibly messed up that not brushing your teeth enough is bad for you and yet brushing your teeth too much is also bad!

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@Lauren_Leist They are literally the best.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@CamiDRyan Obsessed with cottage cheese.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Some people just look so good in festive wigs. Obviously I’m jealous, but I’m also happy for them.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

This makes me so mad. @Apple didn’t help me at all, but I worry about making the individual people answering phones look bad if I say that on these surveys.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Someone said “she’s full of baloney!” and my mind went SANDWICH

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Per Billie, a crop top is a perfect garment for fluctuating temperatures. Also very flattering. ❤️

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

Autocorrect changed “bronchitis” to “bro crisis.” Compelling.

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@zombalia This is excellent information because I LOVE the raspberry shortbread cookies and I’m tired of being disappointed!

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

So, hypothetically, can you call Trader Joe’s and ask if they have the good raspberry cookies in, or would they get mad?

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

@LouisianaGov @GreenWaveFB ICONIC

[Malindi @Vink_Inc]

I just LOVE a comeback. #RollWave

[Left Field Lounger @LFLatMSU]

0.2% chance to win the game & won. 😱