Wacky Toddler

kids are crazy. some observations from a stay at home dad.

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Daddy, you forget everything. Becauw you are a forgetter

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Kid: "why do mouths talk?" #deepthoughts #ToddlerLife

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Things I never thought I'd say: "my kid just shit in the tasting room floor." #parenting #microbrew

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Kid: there was an egg on the floor, on the hay just like moo cows. Moo cows make milk, just like mommy. #toddlerlife #EasterEggRoll #easter

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Kid: "don't say me those words in my ears". Me: "I'm just singing" #ToddlerLife #americanidol #singinginthecar

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Wife to baby "why did you drop all your toys on the ground?" Toddler "that's unaccep-table". #ToddlerLife #unacceptablebehavior #Parenting

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Having a deep conversation about external family dynamics. Kid responds with, "guys, I just burped on this bread". #ToddlerLife #family

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Toddler, full of anger "I don't want to be with my family!" Storms off, walks 20 feet. "Hey guys, look a rainbow!!!!" #ToddlerLife #emotions

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Kid - *after a plane she is on lands* "guys, is everyone ok on here" #frequentflyer #toddlerlife

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Wife is teaching kid about cranial nerves. As soon as she can say lateral rectus she will officially be smarter than me. #smartypants

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Glanced and a shopping list of a guy infront of me at the grocery store. Item #1 was "chainsaw". #parenting @STIHLUSA #powertools

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Wife: do you want to hear about social equity?
Kid: that sounds like a scary place.
Kid nailed it! #parenting #ToddlerLife #politics

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Adult: "I'm so f'ng frustrated with these cookies" kid: "why are you so f'ng frustwated?" #repeater #wackytoddler #oops #christmascookies

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Wife "what did you name the elf"
Kid "eggs"
''Tis the season for eggs in the morning. #wackytoddler #whatsinaname #parenting #elfonashelf

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

"No no no, don't lick the book. We don't lick books." #parenting

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Kid holds up stuffed animal dog - "this is my puppy. His name is balls. Balls, balls, balls". #wackytodler #whatsinaname #balls

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

Unprompted - kid just "made" my wife a coffee. "Here you go, it's a half caf". Kid slays the regular orders #wackytoddler #barista

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

My daughter watches @steelers football and eats #bacon.

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

"Daddy are you my prince?" #HeartMelts #toddlerlife #fatherofadaughter #happy

[Wacky Toddler @WackyToddler]

I may have just used "because China is a communist country" as justification in a why fight with my toddler. #parenting #toddlerproblems #us