Watch Me Mom

Sometimes I work, sometimes I'm at home, sometimes I work at home. All of the time, I mom.

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Watch me mom*

*mom (verb): to feed, bathe, teach, carry, sigh at, watch, raise, wipe, give mom-eye to, nurse, change, help, acquire 10 jackets for, discipline, laugh at, cuddle, play with, dress, and love a child.

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

I potty trained my first using chocolate chips as rewards.

It doesn’t work for the third one. This one wants olives 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

My partner puts on Billy Talent and the 7yo literally comes running

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Today my baby (3rd child) laid down with his head on the wrong side of the change table.

I was so lost… I can’t change a left facing baby. It is simply beyond by skill set. I was a #firsttimemom all over again. 🥲

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: Mom, does my teacher have a tongue?

I mean… I guess she’s never seen it with the masks…

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: it’s no fun to get old!!!

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: when I get to be a mom then I get to have *points at my wine* *gives fancy eyebrows*

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Reminded today of the time the hyper conservative Sunday school teacher from my FIL’s church asked my 3yo how he got a bruise on his forehead to which he responded “my daddy hit me in the liquor store”

It was a one-way turnstile door that slipped out of dad’s hand.

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Had to teach my 4.5 yo how to play tag yesterday. She was so confused and sad as to why everyone was running away from her.

#thankscovid

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo - my brain can talk a lot. To me.

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: Mom, how do you get dead?

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Me: I want a hamster.

7yo: I wished for a hamster!

4yo: I wish I WAS a hamster!

#hamster #nopetsrental

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: What makes us grow?

Me: Food!

4yo: But food makes poop?!?!?

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo: Hey Mom, what does snot smell like?

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

It’s a “Keep Holding On” by Avril Lavigne kind of year.

I’ll be blasting this song on repeat while I attempt to write my PhD comprehensive exam at home with my 4yo and 1yo.

@Momademia

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Partner before taking care of 1yo full time: Why do you keep letting the baby get the markers?

Partner now: WHERE DID YOU GET THAT MARKER FROM?!?! I THOUGHT I TOOK THEM ALL AWAY!!!

#StayAtHomeParent

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Went back to work today (in my basement) after extended mat leave.

15 month old didn’t even care. Happy as a clam to hang out with dad all day. 🙄

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Anyone else’s brain tell them they should wash their hands after a zoom meeting?

#MyPoorBrain #WashYourHands #Tired #Zoom

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

School: there has been a case in your child’s class… a case of lice that is!

I’m simultaneously relieved and horrified 😧

#headlice #notcovid #icantstopitching #sendhelp

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

Fed my baking addiction by making 90s themed party snacks 🤤

[Watch Me Mom @WatchMeMom247]

4yo (f) was diagnosed with ADHD and sensory processing issues yesterday. Doctor said “she’s quirky… but I don’t think it’s autism.”

I hear this is a common thing said about autistic girls. Many thoughts and feelings.

#parenting #ADHD #quirky #autism