Weekends Golfer

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

I actually have dealt with Adam Scott in the past. I saw him at the airport and waved. Must not have seen me though cause I got nothing back

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Scott would be feeling the exact same pressure that I felt standing over a putt to save having a 10 last Saturday #samething

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

One of the older guys just pointed me out to his mate. Think its the same guy that I saw when I dropped a ball on the 7th fairway #busted

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Big comp today so need something. Have brought in the best scorer in the business. Douglas Erwin Bollinger

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Before a putt I like to hold up my putter in line with the hole. Still not sure what it does but I did see it on tv #iputtlikethepros

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Tee Off in 30. Mate has pulled out. Too many beers. Wang the 60 YO Korean just turned up looking for a group. Please don't put him with me

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Ah my fellow club member with a towel clipped to his shorts. No need to meet him, I can already tell he is a fuckwit

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Even though I call fore and show that I want it to miss, a part of me always wants to see my stray drive take someone out.

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

By throwing the grass up in the air to check the wind direction, it gives my competitors the idea that I can adjust accordingly. #I cant

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Hitting the putting green before a round will demonstrate to the rest of the club that you have come ready to play today

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Always give a look of disbelief when you don't get out of the bunker first go like it never happens. Act genuinely surprised #yourenot

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Yes its raining but you will be advising your wife that golf is still on #earlybeers #cantdrivehome #carsleepingover

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

While you will never receive applauds for your failing short game. You can win your group over with your driver speed #swingharder

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Regardless of all the constant media hype about an obesity epidemic, my #1 rule is very clear. NO CART NO PLAY

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

The club cheat left his clubs behind the other day. They now reside in the 18th dam #justice

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

The 13 points I had on Saturday indicate my local pro may have taken me for a ride by saying the $1200 clubs I bought would elevate my game

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Discussing each other wives is off limits on the course. You can however remind your mate that he putts like her when he leaves one short

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Great that the C Grade Pennants manager spotted me drain a 15 footer on Saturday. Told him it was for par. #wasactuallytriplebogey

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

I find hitting up on the group in front of me is a much better way to raise their slow play issues with them #noforecall

[Weekends Golfer @WeekendsGolfer]

Ensure you round down when working out your score on a hole. "Was it 5 or 6, put down 5"