what's in a name

she/her, practically ancient, big as a whole continent & very unhappy about it.
edtwt, all -spos

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I hate my body so much. I look like a beached whale. Is this what I want? To be the size of an actual planet?

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I'm so tired of working 😭 at least it makes fasting that much easier, but damn. I'm tired.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I need a belt. I can fit my whole ass arm into my pants while they're buttoned up 😂

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I finally got my bangs trimmed so I can see again and -

MY HAIRDRESSER NOTICED MY WEIGHT LOSS

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

- her words just bounce around in my head.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

Almost three years ago, a woman who was my friend told me, "You talk about your depression and being suicidal too much."

I haven't spoken to her in over a year. I unfollowed and soft blocked her everywhere.

But still, every time I get bad and want to reach out for help -

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I have so much crap I need to do and I've barely finished one of those things :( today isn't going well, and I just KNOW I'm gonna have emotional hunger later. FML.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

Am I losing as fast as I wanted? No. Am I losing in a mostly-consistent way? Yes. SOMEDAY I will get there.

HW: 305.6
CW: 258.8

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

Idk why, today was great, now it's not great, I'm gonna get drunk and play the Sims until sunrise.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@xXx_Gray_xXx What the FUCK??? Please don't take their words to heart. They're a stupid fucking coward who doesn't even have the guts to try to bully you with their name behind it. They're less than worthless.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

Finally back on my fasting bullshit 😌 I hate hormones

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@psychopIath Fs in chat for all the bitches 💀

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@psychopIath Ok but like... Help a bitch out

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@Starvationwhore That's not even a "milkshake" that looks like fucking COFFEE CREAMER who drinks it like that!?!?

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@skinvaderzim This is an entire mood

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@skinnyforskz Omg thank you so much! I'll keep this line tucked away for next time 😭

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I hate that when I'm stressed/sad, my FIRST thought is "I need to eat"... Like, that's how I got this big to start with. But now I'm sad AND hungry, and everything just feels so much worse for it.

I can't think of any silver linings.

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

About a year ago, I retired one of my favorite shirts. I'd been gaining weight, and it was too tight across my shoulders. I was scared I was going to tear it

Today I tried it on again. It's loose. 🤩

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

I just had game night with some friends, and I had SO much fun, and I had 2.5 slices of pizza... And my friends are gone, and the fun is gone, and I'm crashing, and all I can think about is why I had that much pizza, wouldn't 1 slice have been enough to keep up appearances?

[what's in a name @WhaleClown]

@xXx_Gray_xXx "not much"???? PLEASE don't sell yourself short!!