👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽

"The Lord tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fucked."

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

June was the G7 meeting in Cornwall...where leaders distanced for the photo...then forgot all about that bullshit when it was time for drinks...

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

I'll take the over.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

Headline: "Brits more tolerant of men who have sex with underage girls than men who have sex with Ukrainian rent boys."

[Aaron Bastani @AaronBastani]

According to @YouGov Keir Starmer’s government is now less popular than Prince Andrew. This is not a wind up.

It’s close, but Andrew just edges Labour out on approval ratings (13% vs 12%).

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"Tories insist Chancellor must be sacked if she breaks election vow"

Yeah, because the one thing the Tories never did from 2010-2024 was break a lot of election vows.

Fuck all these people.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"'She has nowhere to go or anyone else to go with': Sarah Ferguson is 'completely on edge' and fears for her future"

I guess this is the "find out" phase of befriending an infamous paedo.

Sorry, two infamous paedos.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

@AmoneyResists It's 2025. Use the metric system, you clown.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

The problem with making long-term predictions is that you almost always think they'll happen far sooner than they actually do.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

@Keir_Starmer Will Ukrainian rent boys need to have digital ID?

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"Nobel laureates sign letter saying ASI technology should be barred until there is consensus that it can be developed ‘safely’"

Hmm, I'm not convinced.

"Harry and Meghan also signed it."

In that case, this must be important!

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"Harry and Meghan join AI pioneers in call for ban on superintelligent systems"

I didn't know where I stood on these issue...until these two geniuses stepped in to guide us all...

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

Given she's an utter clown and an utter failure, why would I vote for any party that embraces her?

[N Ecc 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 @Neccccy]

Should Liz Truss join Reform and would you vote for her if she did?

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

I guess the paedo formerly known as #PrinceAndrew should be glad the Prime Minister is #KierStarmer - the guy who protected #JimmySavile from prosecution.

He'll get to live out the rest of his life in wealth that few can imagine. That's his "punishment" for his raping.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

What sort of "test" is this?

Is that like eating 5 ice creams as a way of testing your "I won't eat ice cream" diet?

[The Associated Press @AP]

BREAKING: Israel strikes southern Gaza in test of ceasefire. https://t.co/G16Jdi7AmW

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

I saw "Gordon Brown" trending.

Sadly, he's still alive.

The devil will have to wait a little longer.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

All those people who'll tell you they're opposed to the death penalty...but are rubbing their hands together in glee over the killing of Ian Watkins...

Pick a lane.

I don't care which one.

Because your current position is utterly moronic.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"It'll come out."

It already came out. Fancy Bears leaked your bullshit TUEs that proved you doped to win the Tour.

“I’ve never cheated. I don’t regret being open about my medical history"

You hid your medical history until Russians leaked it. Then you lied about it. 💉💉💉

[Domestique @Domestique___]

🇬🇧 Bradley Wiggins 🗣️

“There was something greater going on,” he said. “They [Team Sky] chucked me under a bus.” When asked if it was to shield another person, he replied, “Yes.” Pressed further, he added: “It’ll come out.”

📰 https://t.co/L624FgKtQa

📸 Cor Vos

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

"Geraint Thomas: The two-time Olympic gold medallist details the grit and sacrifice needed to succeed"

I thought the article would be all about how hard it is to ride the Tour if you're asthmatic, but he forgot to mention it.

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

I always assumed it was just one weapon...

[Velon CC @VelonCC]

Pogi has so many weapons in his armoury 🥇

Tadej Pogačar has won his last three races solo, each time with a different type of initial attack.

📸 Sprint Cycling

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

Yet another 75km attack?

You can set your fucking watch by this guy.

#GoldenAgeOfDoping

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

For some reason I'm being reminded of the "except the English papers" scene from Father Ted.

[Antifa_Ultras @ultras_antifaa]

FIFA announced that no sanctions will be imposed on Israel.

FIFA President Infantino: “FIFA cannot solve geopolitical problems.”

[👽 ♫ I'm dopé, I hope you're dopé, too ♫ 👽 @WhatDope]

FIFA: "We'll ban countries that commit war crimes."

Q: Even Russia?

FIFA: "Any country - even Russia." Q: What about Israel?

FIFA: "Now you're just being antisemitic..."

[Antifa_Ultras @ultras_antifaa]

FIFA announced that no sanctions will be imposed on Israel.

FIFA President Infantino: “FIFA cannot solve geopolitical problems.”