p.

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

666 we out here

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Duolingo @duolingo]

Learning Mandarin out of spite? You're not alone.

We’ve seen a ~216% growth in new Chinese (Mandarin) learners in the US compared to this time last year.

[Duolingo @duolingo]

oh so NOW you’re learning mandarin

[Dean 🇬🇺 @dojodean]

I think I’m addicted to Coke Zero..

[Loky @lokymann]

Look what that money make a bitch do

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

holy shit I remember this

[dalton graston @infinitepoo]

Perhaps the greatest thing we ever accomplished as millennials was in the 90’s when we spread a rumor throughout every elementary school in the world, without the use of internet or social media, that Marilyn Manson had ribs removed so he could suck his own dick

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

microdosing rice via empanadas to prepare my body for the treacherous roads ahead

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

TREAT YOURSELF A ROUND OF SAUSAGE

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

or wait nvm u can use them to make popsicle

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

they really out here selling popsicle sticks with no popsicle. is this solely for arts and crafts???

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

CHLOROPHYLL WATER AND ASHWAGANDHA
SOME OF THESE FEELINGS IS HARD TO DESCRIBE

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

I have no words for these string of events except for big makalelu fish and that makes me feel better

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

yeetus da fetus YEET but only if u want to idc

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

Not a playlist but this is probably the most refreshing rap album of 2024. Easy dub.

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

Spotify playlists you should know about:

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

I WAS BORN IN 84 BUT IM LIKE 97 HOV. I WENT PLATINUM OFF THE BRICK I COOKED ON 97 STOVES

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

if u finger drum on the table one more time imma call the casting crew for drumline 2

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

work with no earphones is like taking a shit with no ass eh jokes

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

I’m a loyal friend I got ur back but if the cops interrogate me and I gotta take a shit I’m snitching asap

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

good evening everyone david blaine is here to do magic

*david eats my mason jar*

[p. @YOLOSWAGATTACKS]

CURBAN ON CURBAN