matthew zinman

half of writing is snacking

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Haven’t seen Notre Dame in more trouble since it was on fire.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

The xanax is doing nothing!

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Can we just be done with this fucking guy and then all eat a hot pretzel together and start the healing process

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Looking forward to saying crazy shit tomorrow like, “it’s okay, the bassist from 3 Doors Down is saying that Maricopa County is expecting a ballot dump in 15 minutes!”

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Starting to think that some people aren’t abiding to the “compact” sign in the parking lot.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

I like watching movies because they’re a good reminder that movies actually get made.

[WFAN Sports Radio @WFAN660]

Put the season in the books...but not before @HowieRose reflects on a wild ride.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Great season. Lot of fun. Proud of this team. And of my family for putting up with me during this run. #LGM

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

There are magic powers inside the water spray bottle at the barbershop that make hair do things it will not do at home.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

Find someone who loves you as much as runners love looking at their watch.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

If you need me I’ll be watching the Lindor grand slam for the 1,000th time. #LGM

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

If you need me I’ll be watching the Lindor home run for the 1,000th time. #LGM

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

If you need me I’ll be watching the Alonso home run for the 1,000th time. #LGM

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

I like buying my halloween candy early because then i get to eat it before halloween.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

@Michael_Levin Fear is a stinky cologne

[John Fugelsang @JohnFugelsang]

JD Vance is a fusion of every kid that vanished on the Wonka Factory tour.

[Pete @PeterHoare]

I'd like to take this time to remind everyone that Leighton Meester's father is Mister Meester.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

It would be a great reveal to find out all those houses Jimmy Carter built are crooked and messed up bc he’s 100 years old and building houses.

[matthew zinman @ZinmanMatthew]

About to show my kids The Naked Gun and then taking them tonight to see Green Day for their 1st concert. I am the 90s dad king!!

[internet hall of fame @InternetH0F]

☠️