Richard Chalmers

a man with more issues than cosmopolitan

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

So today I reversed into a Porsche and my little seat won the battle, however the Porsche driver won the insurance war

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

We are lucky enough to get a Banksy on bankside for free but some people still moan , however the same people are happy with a blade in the centre of the city that cost thousands to to get it in to place.

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Chemist at Asda to buy cream for my bad back, she said are you on any other medication? I replied just neat vodka, she replied use this cream and add tonic to the vodka. Classic

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Bob Marley, no woman no cry

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Random Tuesday quiz question! What artist/band made reference in the lyrics to porridge (the breakfast dish) a, the jam, b, bob Marley , c, the proclaimers ?? Bonus slap on the back if you can name the song it’s very famous!! Answer at eight

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

So one of the most prolific sex offenders is being realised after ten years, sorry can’t understand it...

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Happy Christmas to my loyal followers hope you are having a wonderful day !

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

The Christmas period has arrived. Now it’s a waiting game, not for Santa but for which day I will become ill

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

For someone who is not keen on clutter Christmas is not ideal

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Pipes frozen I have no water but have lots of wine so every cloud and all that!

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

@HullCity я желаю вам всего наилучшего

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Being a single parent I do find decorating a Christmas tree a challenge

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Get ready for all the pictures of snow on Facebook

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

@keybiscayne Happy thanksgiving to our American friends you’ve had a tough year! But more importantly you have a lot to be thankful for😀

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Need to go to the casino seem to run out of matches

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Not letting any fireworks of this evening as I would sooner use this for a year, so doing my bit for climate change

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

So I live in the most haunted house in East Yorkshire and I always have sweets ready, but no one ever knocks on Halloween..spooky

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

Halloween the time for mums to show of there carved pumpkins and there little pumpkins dressed in there fancy dress and post on Facebook

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

I am debating with myself if I should get a sun bed to see me through the winter

[Richard Chalmers @007chalmers]

@MW_Podcast @metoffice @alexdeakin Poor Micheal Fish he was only reading what he was told! #lovethejumperfish