10/10 5 stars

Shit yeah, don't even worry! You got this, motherfucker!

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

For a long time I have wondered

"Should I ever pin a tweet?"

Then I remembered this drunken masterpiece

Nice!

[MadCapMunchkin @MadCapMunchkin]

@100PercentAPlus DAMN IT, DAD!!!

BLUE HIS HOUSE, DAD!!!

WITH A LITTLE BLUE WINDOW, DAD!!!

EVERYTHING IS BLUE FOR HIM AND EVERYBODY AROUND, DAD!!!

BECAUSE HE AIN'T GOT NOBODY TO LISTEN, DAD!!!

DAMN IT, DAD!!!

[CJ @cj_rebelink]

Reminds me of the plot to this dance track from the 90s.

[Dalaga ♏ Helios @DalagaHelios]

Nice!

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

Brother thinks he's blue

But I just greenscreened him to make him think that

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

my TED talk would only ever tell youse all that i am indestructible

i am invincible

why don't you go and check if i've died

ain't happened once

biiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@celinatruckstop @RaltsAuthor @100PercentAPlus
Ruminant ungulates can get these hands

Nature must be reminded of its place, under our feet like shoe dirt

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus The heavens whisper

Yes, wisdom from olden times

Who the fuck is Jake

Nice!

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

@FetusberryJam The autumnal winds

Give airflow to this dank kush

The emperor rests

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

Taking a hit of that Ganji Monogataweed

Feeling most inauspiscious on the twentieth day of the fourth month

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus Birds would be even more stupider if they ever slonked a doink of this Mahabharata pack

They would finally get around to growing feet

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus Fucked around and escaped Samsara

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

@FetusberryJam On the upper boughs

The wren cries as it takes flight

Not as high as I

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus I need to take your bishop, but you've given Gerlinda such a compelling backstory

If I remove her from the board, what happens to her dreams of having a family and balancing that with her career, seeing as how she is the first female bishop in the kingdom of Chessboardia?!

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

Performing the 'Autism Gambit' at the chess nationals

That's where I give each of my pieces distinct, lovable personalities in the hopes that my opponent will hesitate to take them

I've made it to grand master on this strategy alone.

[MadCapMunchkin @MadCapMunchkin]

@100PercentAPlus AND I DO MEAN THE MAYO TOO, DAD!!!

TOAD DID THE RIGHT THING, DAD!!!

HONOR IS FOR PUSSIES LIKE WALUIGI, DAD!!!

DAMN IT, DAD!!!

...this took two tweets to rant.

Nice!

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus "ah", he said to himself
"Diogenes was right"
"Plato was a dumb bitch whose name isn't real"

and so he told the Emperor to fuck off and jacked off

"off and off", he mused

yes

"such is life"

nice!

"bitch"

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

He stared into the eyes of eternity

"The creature must fall" he decried

"Piss" the mighty creature responded

Waluigi, forever in his heart, said "I have stayed my blade long enough"

"No" Toad has betrayed the concept of honor by striking first

Waluigi has fallen again

Nice!

[Fetusberry "Full Send" Crunch @FetusberryJam]

@100PercentAPlus Hello Leonardo Toy Story I am Franz Kafka

Have you ever thought about things sometimes?

Like what if you was awake? one morning and is a beetle for instance?

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

Hello

My name is Leo ToyStory

Allow me to introduce you to the worst man in the world

Napoleon

[10/10 5 stars @100PercentAPlus]

Hello

My name is Jane Austen

Allow me to introduce to you the best woman in the world

Elizabeth