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My quarantine routine:
4:00, wallow in self-pity
4:30, stare into the abyss
5:00, solve world hunger, tell no one
5:30, jazzercize
6:30, dinner with me—I can't cancel that again
7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing....I'm booked
when I was in hs I told my teacher I was gonna get my PhD from Harvard. She laughed and said “that’s a tough goal maybe be more realistic?” Today I’m happy to announce that I’ve been put on academic probation and have 0 chance of getting into grad school. She was completely right
Pitbull is sitting alone in his penthouse watching the halftime show. It's dark except for the flicker of the TV. Shakira and JLo join together for the finale as a tear rolls down his cheek. He heaves a sigh.
"Dale", he whispers, as he fades away.