Emma Paxton

stand up comedian | professional eye roller.

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

@marcmaron @phish It was a fab convo!!!!!!

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

A man’s biggest flex in his thirties is … follicles

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Only one ring? Wait till December, you’re supposed to get 6.

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

I’m glad Spotify wrapped is done, y’all have terrible taste

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

What is #nathanfielder diagnosis

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Pie or cake? …Cake

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

#BenShapiro talks faster than #Gilmoregirls the chipmunk version

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Can’t #MariahCarey get some new material god damn, what about a #thanksgiving song?!

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

The scariest costume I saw on Halloween
Was a Disney adult

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Dressing up as a bride this Halloween so my bf takes a hint ;)

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Indie folk is my fave genre aka I have depression

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

memoria praeteritorum bonorum

[Reese @Reeseforsure]

I’ll diagnose you

-me flirting

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Chasing the pinnacle it’s not possible

[kevin @Ke7inBurke]

who is this for

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

@oldmartyr And yet you made this tweet about you lol jk jk jk

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Words are cheap. That’s why I’m selling mine for at least 100 dollars per sentence.

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Men are masters of emotional edging

[Emma Paxton @1sweetworld88]

Lost in limerance