misskellyrenee

nutritionist for cute babies, petter of strange dogs, thinker of thoughts

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Happy 17th birthday to a majority of my iTunes playlist

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

I saw a tiktok of a woman who had a @DietCoke fountain machine installed in her house and now that’s my measure of success

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Poorly placed ad? Or expertly places ad?

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Hear me out: Live action Doug

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when Johnny Cash was listening to NIN songs he wanted to cover & him hearing “Closer” and being like “yeah…not this one”

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

The FDA really needs to regulate the claim “extreme sour!” Because I can’t keep taking this kind of disappointment

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

What if the turning point for someone’s self esteem was solving one of those clickbait puzzle ads that claim “99% of people fail this!!!”

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Remember the people that would come to college campuses & hand out @redbull ? I need them now and to generally follow me everywhere, constantly supplying me with caffeine.

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

My dad just referred to Captain Kangaroo as a “salt of the earth” kind of person

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

@LizzyBoBeezy This place is so good! Pricey but the food is amazing

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

@LizzyBoBeezy Are you near Culver City at all?

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

When life hands you lemons, give a slice to your baby, film their reaction and put it on tiktok, go viral and then spend weeks debating your merits as a mother. Then go back to normal.

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Today’s the day I put a fucking clown in her place

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

When I make fun of my intelligence it is. It because I believe I am that stupid it is because I believe EVERYONE is that stupid and secretly hoping someone says something.

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

I was listening to a lo-fi playlist of popular songs and the version of “Down Under,” was unexpectedly depressing

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Some days I can’t tell if I live in an episode of Breaking Bad or Parks and Rec

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

Whenever I come home I wonder if my cat is mad that she ha to “re-mark” me. Like “damn it, I JUST did this!”

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

@kevinbigley Oh. Oh Buddy. Buddy, no. I’ve got news.

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

17 year old Kelly was full of important things to say

[misskellyrenee @20goingon5]

If someone wanted to time travel back to the 90s we would really need to prepare them for all the yelling and the general VOLUME of everything