ellie

[Hassan Mafi ‏ @thatdayin1992]

The craziest thing about gas prices going up from $2.89 to $4.50 in the US in just 6 weeks is that Donald Trump raped a 13 year old girl.

[P.preety @preetyiy]

I like using twitter because none of my friends use it

[dior ✞ @deeore5]

ever since i was a little kid i knew that i wanted to be late for work

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

not all of us were made to cook. some of us were made to have conversations with the person cooking.

[Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth]

I just rolled a joint. It was my ankle.

[mark @TheCatWhisprer]

The rear view camera on my car went out so I had to rotate my neck and turn my head to back out just like they did on the Oregon Trail.

[Mads @europemaxxed]

There's a lot of ugly in this world, but there's sure as hell is a lot of beauty too

[🧑🏾‍🦱 @ewgraiam]

they’re saying there’s 30g of protein in spending a night laughing with your friends

[🤠 @heavensbvnny]

April fools day is cancelled this year because every day is a fucking joke

[The Saurus @TheSaurus831]

Everyone who isn’t a fucking moron did

[𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖑𝖞❤️‍🔥 @Charlygotyou]

Jeff Bezos paid $50M for a wedding.
He just got a $16B tax break.
He laid off 60k people.
And you’re furious about a kid getting a free school lunch.

[ellie @3lli3pie]

@em_Lazzy Respectfully, a lot of us are poor, over worked and just trying to survive. I would love to overthrow the government but unfortunately I can barely afford groceries, housing and other basic necessities.

[parks @parkersity_9]

twitter is Iike the smoking area for social media

[𝑮 ♡ @highitsg]

i’ll ask a ouija board before i ask chatgpt

[hunter @3gpmh]

micro dosing hell by staying informed and educated

[le.hl @0xleegenz]

I can't believe human were gifted a planet with full of trees, fruit, water, animals and sunshine and then they invented debt, capitalism and war

[🦢 @meishato]

Americans be like: death penalty is great and war is good and I deserve to have 10 guns but abortion is murder

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

the seperation of church and state would be so fucking cool right now

[ひ @yungnstackin]

sometimes when i'm reaping i'm like damn wtf did i sow