4ndr34

Everything is uncomfortable, nothing makes sense, relearning who I am and I kind of hate it a little bit. UPDATE: new fun twist, all of reality is actually hell

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

I have decided that since I am teetering on the precipice of being the primary caregiver for my oblivious/willfully ignorant?/maladjusted-bordering-on-psychopathic father, now is a great time to unironically become active on Twitter again.

Hello.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Absolutely nothing makes any amount of sense anymore.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

@mkilly @a1phab3t Don't want Sophie pushing you off the bed.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Everytime I think about tweeting again, I come here and immediately remember that I am not hardcore enough for Twitter anymore.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

@SheRatesDogs I just got a call from an unknown number and I couldn't understand the dude so I made him repeat himself three times and he was like "I think I have the wrong number" and then I said "Okay" and just hung up. Then he immediately texted me.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

@MyFavMurder

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

@THAT_derekolson charade

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Side goal for 2019, get a litter box that does not ruin my life whenever my untrainable cats use it.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Oh, girl.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Maybe the difference this time is that I'm going into this knowing it's going to be extremely difficult. #noillusions

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

I'm not dragging anyone into 2019 with me. Either come willingly or not at all.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

@SheRateDogs ONLY -5?

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

And like, if you don't care, TELL ME and then I can stop wasting both of our time.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

The response of "that sucks" is equivalent with "lol" and "k" to me. I hate it. What a minimally committal reply, and presumably to a story that I am feeling strong emotions over. I would rather you NOT RESPOND AT ALL over a response that makes me feel like you don't care.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Am I a bad person for being surprised when I find out annoying people have spouses? Does it help my case that once I get past the surprise, I think "good for them"? Maybe this is one of those things I should wonder to myself and not to Twitter.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Nothing screams "look how great I think I am" than someone attempting to perform someone else's work better and basically rehashing it, doing it poorly or just straight-up making it nearly unrecognizable.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Okay, if you're going to cover a song, you damn well better be elevating it. If it's already a great song, you are probably making a mistake. If it's a mediocre song, under no uncertain terms should your rendition also be mediocre.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

There was about a week where Waze told me I would arrive at my destination, "Redmond, Western Australia." Now I miss it every day. The closest I've ever been to traveling down under.

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

I mean, you can't cry if you're eating sooo

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

What the goddamn hell happened where suddenly everyone is typing "isle" when they mean aisle? I've been trying to ignore it BUT OBVIOUSLY I CAN'T ANYMORE. Spell check doesn't catch it because isle is a thing but YOU PEOPLE ARE NOT SHOPPING ON YOUR ADORABLE PRIVATE ISLAND, OKAY?

[4ndr34 @4ndr34]

Can someone explain how I managed to get a bug bite when I work in a secure clean facility that is supposed to prevent pathogens from even getting inside