The Lunar Canine

Hundred to one, they never set foot in the ocean.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Sitting here watching Big Wednesday for 111th time. Hard to imagine but I'm the same age as Bear now. Getting old is a strange trip.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

The brokest dude you know is out here trying to figure out how to buy his third piece of property.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

swimming pool, bbq, sandlot, fireworks #aintthatamerica

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Twitter forever wanting me to get verified, but like bro.... I am a figment of your imagination.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

I made Huli Huli chicken tonight. That shit really hit the spot.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Belly full of wine and garlic. I could never make it as a vampire.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

I've been pretty depressed lately but Father's Day was pretty good.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Growing up the way that I did didn't leave me a lot of options; I was either gonna wind up broke or I was gonna wind up broke with a 54 Ford Wagon in the driveway.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

I know I say this every couple of years, but life is fucking weird man.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Late night swimming in the cement pond.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

"Now look here, I did not say, I was a millionaire
But I said, I have spent more money than a millionaire
'Cause if I had kept all of the money I had already spent
I would've been a millionaire a long time ago"

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

I just need another million bucks and then I can fix everything.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Living inland is for snakes and vultures, this is no place for a merman.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

These Sean Astin calls aren't nearly as entertaining as the Fran Drescher calls were.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

If you aren't up ironing drapes while everyone else has gone to bed are you even really a homeowner?

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

A man doesn't get in a situation like this every day. Not in Bedford Falls anyway.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

"Surfing music has to sound untrained with a certain rough flavor in order to appeal to teenagers... when the music gets too good, and too polished, it isn't considered the real thing." - Murry Wilson

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Working an Open House is a lot like working a spokesmodel gig. You sit around and do nothing for a while, and if someone shows up you pretend to know what you're talking about. "It slices, it dices, it reduces inflamation! Cut your commute in half with this charming fixer upper!"

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

That feeling when you're staring at a pot wondering why it isn't boiling only to discover that you never lit the burner.

[The Lunar Canine @666Jimmy666]

Every now and then I'll try to google some really specific thing and google images fires back with pictures of myself.