Totally Kyle

TOTALLY

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So this one time I was wanting to make s'mores so I put my mellow under the fire but the fire was ketchup #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I like put my right foot over my left foot and I like started walking.. And I was all "woahhh" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I was, you know, at an animal shelter and I saw my neighbor Jeff and I was all "Jeff, you're an accountant" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

so this one time i was like fishing, and i like saw a fish. so i like tried to catch it, but it was a taco. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So I broke up with this chick and she was all like "just give me a reason...Kyle" And I was "your name's a color" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I like saw a giant balloon, you know, in the sky, and I was all "wow! That's a giant balloon... in the sky" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So I just saw this sign that was all like "MISDEMEANOR" and I was like who are you Mrs. Demeanor?!?! #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I walked into a grocery store to buy apples and the lady was all "this isn't an apple. This is a squash." #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So this asian soup distributor told me I needed to "embrace twitter lingo" so like i guess I'm "totes Kyle" #TotallyKyle #TotesKyle woahh.

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So I was drinking some orange soda out of this straw one time but it was totally broken and I realized it was beef jerky. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

Umm one time I had this mosquito bite, and it was all like itchy, so I like scratched it. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I was like taking a shower and my eyes were all burning cus I got like soap in like my eyes & my eyes were like "ow!" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

"Mum the sofa is like all lumpy." And then mum was like "You're sitting on your Grandma" so I was like "oh"... #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

Ummm I have to tinkle. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

I like called my mom about my cousin yelling things at me in NJ, and she was all "You don't have a cousin in New Jersey." #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So we sat in the car and like put on the radio like like loud. Only the car didn't have a radio. So it was mostly quiet. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I had this double cheeseburger & it was good and the cheese was all like double & it was like the best cheeseburger. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

So I looked up toasters on the interweb...net, and like toasters don't play tunes. They cook bread. #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

But no tunes came out of my radio, so I'm all "This is bogus!" But then, my best bud leaf is all "Dude! It's a Toaster!" #TotallyKyle

[Totally Kyle @90sTotallyKyle]

One time I was like walking to school because, ya know, I have to go to school. #TotallyKyle