Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸

King of the Dipshits. I am still the hammerhead shark bitch. credit to: @Brad_Attitude “The Perry” ~Ricoh Blackmon

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Mom: “you’re full of very depressing animal facts tonight”. What can I say, I know a lot of useless things

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Despite all of Twillights obvious flaws, I think the most egregious issue is Edward just being in people’s houses without an invitation literally ALL the time.

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

One of my airmen today goes “ma’am I hope this isn’t out of pocket but did you get your nails done” and idk this stuck out to me so much but that was the most adorable way he could have asked

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

My friend asked me what my sign was to see if we’re compatible and I lied and he’s like “wow 99% compatible” like bruv, we’re friends already whatchu mean “wow” I could have said I was Pescatarian and it would have been the same answer

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

“What are you giving up for lent, actually you know what Im giving up? Breathing”. ~Doug

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

I saw a post about how all orange cats share a single brain cell and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Me as a child: I can’t believe my parents are making me go to bed at 8, that’s so early
Me as an adult, happily in bed well before 8pm

[Daily Wire @realDailyWire]

Disney when Gina Disney when
Carano uses Pedro Pascal
an analogy uses an analogy

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

The next time I get a flu shot I’m gonna post about it on Facebook with pictures because that’s apparently normal now

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Today my hubris finally vanquished me, I thought coach made a mistake cause it looked to easy to only be a 3 rounds of 3 min. I cannot express how much these hurt. Burpees are better than whatever this shit is. https://t.co/KAupTrj038

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

When the MSgt says he prefers to fly with you instead of other pilots in your training program 🥰🥰

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Another friend and I are great friends cause I started off hating him from the beginning cause he ate some of my chili. But now he cooks dinner for me on a semi regular basis

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

One of my best friends and I are great friends cause he spit water all over me laughing at his own joke one of the first times we were out drinking together

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

I really want to learn ASL this year, I have an ok basis on BSL and I feel like they should be kinda similar.

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

But I got 100% on my surprise test this morning so it’s a celebratory drunk and not a depressed drunk

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

Friend: “so how’s it going at public health” me: “for your SA I will be getting drunk tonight”

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

I haven’t complained about my life enough recently on social media so I guess that’s a sign things are either going well or I don’t have enough time to complain

[shoe @shoe0nhead]

SHE KNOWS

[Perry Gonzalez 🇵🇷🇬🇧🇺🇸 @9zalez]

THANK YOU no ones right to life should be revoked based on discriminating against a disability.