ABC News Intern

Work experience kid slaving his guts out in the news and current affairs division of Aunty. It's not like they pay me, so these satirical thoughts are my own.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Twitter when a Beyoncé or Taylor album comes out.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Probably unrelated.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

@paranoidfemoid look i'm not a cat person

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Seven's bullshit excuses over two consecutive days:
"human error"
"a junior member of staff"

Tomorrow:
"technical error"?
"a disgruntled former employee"?
"the blue mountains leopard"?

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

It's also 10 years since nasty little ponce King Joffrey Baratheon was poisoned at his own wedding. https://t.co/OY2qYNMaJF

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

NEXT SEASON ON DEFAMATION AUSTRALIA

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

When you pause for breath between fits of giggling, remember the ABC and News Corp settled for hundreds of thousands of dollars.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Justice Michael Lee on Lehrmann’s decision to bring the defamation case, after his criminal trial was aborted: “Having escaped the lions’ den, Mr Lehrmann made the mistake of going back for his hat.” https://t.co/znqB0lMxtl

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

He looks like a morose toddler wearing an undersized Bee Gees Halloween costume.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

I hate seeing his ratty little face everywhere.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

He looks like a cartoon villain on too much cortisone.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Based on recent news, are you more or less likely to believe that a @7NewsSpotlight producer thought this was the decor in an Australian Parliament House ministerial office?

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Cannot escape. The post-pubescent dadbod creeper and his cocaine dealer television network have turned up in Variety. https://t.co/3bTIhTgnBm

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

I know I have changed my position, but please, do not reform Australian defamation law. Rich people pissing into their own mouths for weeks on end is better than 12 streaming services.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Imagine calling your current affairs show Spotlight – Spotlight! – and running it like the concierge desk at a "family run" Vegas casino.

[ABC News Intern @ABCnewsIntern]

Congratulations @zdaniel. https://t.co/63MPrGTLYf