AStroman

| Proud founder of ASU | Insanely Handsome | Funny Jokes | 6’8 260 | Cold Beer Enthusiast | Not addicted to Zyns |

[AStroman @AStro7man]

And that’s the bottom line cause astroman said so!

[AStroman @AStro7man]

It’s Monday. Got called off work, already drank my coffee and took a shit. Time to jerk off.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

@bingostevenhere At this point of the dry spell I would take the worst sex of my life. Bad sex is still sex🫡

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Do you think cops hate black people, more than black people hate cops? Just a thought.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Some say drinking alone makes you an alcoholic. I agree with those who say it makes you mature.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Orgasmed as I took my boots off after work. Still gonna tug my shit.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Thinking about 2-10 beers and calling my ex.

[Jon Gruden @BarstoolGruden]

Thinking about football.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Blue balled. Feeling like 2016 Astroman

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Been asking Santa for it. Starting to think that fuckers fake.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Is there an age you stop using private browser for porn? Don’t live with my parents, and haven’t gotten my phone checked since I was 12. #LANK

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Grown man with the name Brock. You can’t be above 12 years old with that name. Grow up.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Me and my buddy’s recent chats. House cannon? #CBTM

[AStroman @AStro7man]

ITS FRIDAY! Drop your cocks and grab your socks! Let’s get weird today!

[AStroman @AStro7man]

No saving necessary. He’s right where he needs to be!

[AB @AB84]

The question is…is he even breathing?

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Need a button on my nightstand to make her evaporate after sex. I’m not pillow talking. There’s no future for us. No u can’t sleep over.

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Milf on a zero turn mower. #CBTM

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Hold that sign proudly Red!!

[poppa @popitforpoppa]

when she casually says something that confirms she won't be my wife

[AStroman @AStro7man]

@BigDaddy343434 Like a toxic ex girlfriend. You always find yourself going back

[AStroman @AStro7man]

Browns playing at 9:30 really gonna affect mood all day. Could wanna kms before noon