Joke of the Day

Daily jokes guaranteed to get a giggle

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

How do you get a good price on a sled?

You have toboggan

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

What is a birds favourite social media to use?

None of them, birds don't use computers.

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

What do you call a carwash that won't wash cars anymore?
Broken.

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

A son tells his father, “I have an imaginary girlfriend.” The father sighs and says, “You know, you could do better.” “Thanks Dad,” the son says. “That means a lot.” The father shakes his head and goes, “I was talking to your girlfriend.”

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

A kid decided to burn his house down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, “That’s arson.”

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

I went to a smoke shop only to discover it’d been replaced by an apparel store.
Clothes, but no cigar.

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

What has five toes and isn't your foot?

My foot

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. At least it does if you throw it hard enough

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support windows.

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

My landlord told me we need to talk about the heating bill. "Sure," I said. "My door is always open

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of the computer?

The Space Bar

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

Imagine if you walked into a bar and there was a long line of people waiting to take a swing at you. That’s the punch line

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes—the others were 7’s and 8’s.

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

Have you heard about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

How does cereal pay its bills?

With Chex

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

If prisoners could take their own mug shots…They’d be called cellfies

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

What is a guitar player's favorite Italian food?

Strum-boli

[Joke of the Day @AT_DailyJoke]

Did you know that the first french fries weren’t cooked in France?

They were cooked in Greece