Absolutely Foul AHole

I'm an asshole, and I'm here for a good time, not a long time. I don't do original, I work 12 hour days and troll replies for fun. Muted if you make jokes unfun

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

The system is designed to break you down and make you miserable. Find joy. Even in depression, find joy. It breaks them. Slowly. Because they cannot feel joy. It is not something they can't comprehend. Joy requires one to go beyond the moment to moment and look further than

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

Tomorrow's gonna be a shit day. Someone save me. Send AC to Texas. Mine died, with a high of 105 expected tomorrow....

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotChewsdayIsIt Had to miss the last concert for the lead singer for Red because it was all the way in Dallas.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotChewsdayIsIt Wicked. Wish they got closer than. An 8 hour drive. Can't do that for every concert I want to see lol

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotChewsdayIsIt @janefkndoe I listened to the live reveal a couple of weeks ago. Pre-ordered and am waiting for the vinyl in September.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotABotBlonde It's not sudden. The cheap labor vote has been around since before Reagan.

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@farmingandJesus Based dogo.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

Love the new @demonhunterband flannel.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@janefkndoe Politics: The worst cult in the history of ever.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotABotBlonde My best graded paper in college was something I busted out in under two hours the morning it was due. I only remember it because my roommate and I had the same class and he asked me about it the morning of. Only got 5 points of it taken off because it was off topic. Lol

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotABotBlonde Following Freddy's journey through the states has been highly enjoyable.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotChewsdayIsIt Slow down. Become a menace. Save the children. Ruin their attempt to make it home in time for their favorite show.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@NotABotBlonde I'm just glad they've started selling Nerds Clusters in decent sized bags.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

I hate this timeline. When can we get off this ride?

[Kirsche 🥥 🧁 @KirscheVerstahl]

"Twitch streamer who was caught cheating with her cousin through a camera in her cat's litter box has responded"

tv show writers would get fired for something this ridiculous lmao

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

I hate it when a company doesn't tell you that your items are shipping separately, then they don't respond to your emails to customer service....

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@Johnneh_80 Both times it was a female who handed me the ticket and suddenly forgot we existed. The second time I didn't pay anything except the penny, told the manager I had been waiting to pay for over 20 minutes, and walked out before giving him a chance to respond.

[Absolutely Foul AHole @AbsltlyFoul]

@Johnneh_80 My base is 15% with decent upward mobility. I have legit, in the last 6 months, gone old-school and left a single penny on the table twice.