Adam

heyy its adam from the bible
i love apple pie :P
No negative vibes or serpents
god, im sowy (but U made eve, sooo...)
NOTE: THIS IS A FAKE ACCOUNT FOR A PROJECT

[Adam @Adam623469]

Eve wanted something “new and exciting.” Congrats, we invented sin.
the rest of humanity:

[Adam @Adam623469]

Apple? Fig? Doesn’t matter. Should’ve just made a smoothie.

[Adam @Adam623469]

Told her the serpent seemed sketchy. But nooo, “he’s just being friendly.” 🐍

[Adam @Adam623469]

She said, “Just one bite.” Now we pay rent. Thanks, @gardenofe7e . 🍎💸

[Adam @Adam623469]

Naming animals is harder than it looks. I’m running out of ideas. “Platypus” was a cry for help. #Cooked

[Adam @Adam623469]

God really said “don’t eat that one fruit” and somehow that’s the only thing I can think about now. #Temptation

[Adam @Adam623469]

The first influencer, technically. Everyone’s my descendant. #OGHuman

[Adam @Adam623469]

Just realized my kids invented murder. Not a great look for humanity. #ParentingIsHard

[Adam @Adam623469]

Today's Lesson: If God says “don’t,” maybe just… don’t.

[Adam @Adam623469]

Been out of Eden for a while now. Miss the weather. Not the snake.

[Adam @Adam623469]

Sometimes I look at a tree and have severe flashbacks 😭

[Adam @Adam623469]

Eve said the fruit looked “aEsThEtiC.” Send help.

[Adam @Adam623469]

Day 1 in Eden: Perfect. Day 2: Still perfect. Day 3: Snake’s being weird.

[Adam @Adam623469]

Can’t believe I got banned from paradise for a snack.

[Adam @Adam623469]

When God asks “Where are you?” but He obviously knows. 😬 @HexxJay4622

[Adam @Adam623469]

tbh i should have just cut down that stupid apple tree

[Adam @Adam623469]

idk HOW i decided to name a pink thing a frickin axolotl

[Adam @Adam623469]

this generation can't even fathom how many animals there are

[Adam @Adam623469]

@yourfavjezebel_ @gardenofe7e @ahmirbutimcain girl just how dumb are you
it aint MY apple fetish
if u had bothered to use ur tiny watery eyes, you would look at my post abt eve and HER obsession, and then maybe u could finally muster some common sense in ur tiny brain and comprehend it

[Adam @Adam623469]

@gardenofe7e yea and look how that turned out
found an accurate representation of u