Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀

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[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@BlockClubCHI Paying $55K to make sure my kid cant think critically is diabolical

[🏳️‍🌈 Out Of Context International Dubs 🏳️‍🌈 @OutOfContxtDubs]

Show: The Simpsons
Language: Japanese

[Jasmine('s boobs hurt) @Ranting_Trans]

Tony Soprano jerking off be like "Gabbagoon"

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@Gavin_McInnes @danawhite Please bring back dos and donts but for public figures

[trap dad @dude_gang]

dip the blunt in caesar dressing

[Integrity Guy @Integrity_Freak]

No ma’am, I don’t have a boarding pass. I’m simply here to enjoy the world famous dining and nightlife at O’Hare International Airport

[Gennaro Gattuso @fred16674]

World Cup fans....choose your best

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@BENBALLER Cuz this site is owned by a Nazi

[Alex @ajak1033]

The Spurs know how to TAKE the lead, they just don't know how to HOLD the lead. And that's really the most important part of the lead: the holding

[Black Girl @t_sadiity]

why tornados never hit banks? blow some money out that mf

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@_ROB_29

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

Oh that's disgusting where can I find these so I can stay away

[Rob @_ROB_29]

I don’t know what this fruit is called but I know it needs to calm the hell down.

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@emmitonair Alex Caruso

[chaotic memes @memechaotic]

Not all heroes wear capes.

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@HunterBiden I became a big fan when it was revealed your dad texted you "Good morning my beautiful son" that's so nice and certain groups tried to spin that in a bad way and it's just impossible

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@stats_feed Furiously jacking off breathing audibly through my mouth "It's a decongestant!"

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@CityScapesNC Tokyo

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@propublica

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@stats_feed Caffeine

[Everything I touch is a spaceship 🚀 @AdamJKo]

@15thWard4Change @realBlagojevich ...yeah fuck you Blago you bag of shit embarrassment, Daley also sold off the parking meters that fucks us in multiple ways.

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

Things most Americans agree on:

Groceries cost too much.

Tariffs suck and make no sense.

Congress and Presidents shouldn’t trade stocks.

The debt is a mess.

The border should be secure, but legal immigration is good.

Endless wars are stupid, especially ones that nobody wants and have never been explained.

Americans are exhausted.

AI is like my new best friend that also might be trying to take my job, my ability to think for myself, and my humanity in the process. Yo like I love you, but WTF, but I still love you.

Diversity is actually awesome! The opposite is boring AF.

Canadians are super fucking cool.

Mexicans are chill.

Putin isn’t a good guy looking out for America’s best interest. Rocky IV and Miracle are great movies.

Good neighbors are a blessing.

Freedom of religion and coexistence without having to blow each other up is probably a good idea.

We all question, are we alone in the universe?

We all fuck up along the way.

Epstein didn’t hang himself.

The Trumps and Epstein were best friends for decades. It’s like Bert trying to tell us Ernie was just an acquaintance in the same social scene on Sesame Street back in the day.

The Cowboys suck. Go Birds!

Things we’re told to fight about:

Me.
Laptop.
Vaccines.
Transgenders in sports.
Pronouns.

That’s the joke.