Adam Portrais

Everything I say is a joke.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@elonmuskADO A.

[Moe 🐐 Factz @MoeFactz]

What the 25th Amendment looks like. #Debates2024

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@ThatChrisGore I’m…..I’m sorry. (but not THAT sorry….)

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

I just backed Worlds Within: Simple to Learn, Easy to Play, Fun to Explore on @Kickstarter https://t.co/jnidQHbirg

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

Waiting an hour for a haircut at Sports Clips is like waiting to pay to be punched in the face.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

I’ve let my Netflix and Hulu subscriptions fall. I’m sure this won’t shock you- but I don’t miss them. I bet you wouldn’t either. Are (HBO) Max & Disney+ (which I paid full years for) next on the chopping block? Streaming needs to figure something out- because this ain’t it.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@adamcarolla Spotted today. Same as it ever was….

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

Ughhhhhh. What the actual fuck?

[Tyler Fischer @TyTheFisch]

NYC just sprayed chemicals into my house at 10:30pm with NO warning!🦠🦠🦠WTF?!!!

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen That’s LITERALLY how we got here. No Man Around the House was conceived to “help” the black family by making sure they got money (as long as there was no man about the house). The Government WANTS you dependent on them because then you’ll vote for them.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen Worst since Jim Morrison- I said it!

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen What’s the best part of a RHCP song? When Anthony shuts up and lets the people with talent play.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen On one of the COLDEST days of the year?! Plan correctly, sir!

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen Got mine!

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@RyanVGenderen I CRINGE at the idea of listening to 311 today. If it came on XM, I’d swerve to the other lane.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@adamcarolla THIS is what you’re looking for. South Chicago Packing Wagyu Beef Tallow Spray, 7 Ounces, Paleo-friendly, Keto-friendly, 100% Pure Wagyu https://t.co/Rn0DYQlTzd

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@0ddsam Despite the kills being too similar- this was a super fun entry.

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

Just preordered #Prey on 4K from Best Buy because physical media STILL matters. Thanks to @DannyTRS for understanding that (but as a fan since the TRS days- I didn’t have a doubt). #4k #PhysicalMedia

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

Footloose. Make it difficult next time.

[Dudja @TheRealDudja]

Do you know what movie this is?

[Adam Portrais @AdamPortrais]

@marty_merrick