Adam Yaros

I routinely nap before 11AM. I enjoy leather bound books, coffee, and I am a hammock enthusiast. Grad of UVF and PTS. ENTJ

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

As the children attempt to assert their dominance over each other:

“Kai, quit smashing your face into Seth’s butt.”

“Seth, get your butt out of Kai’s face.”

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

You know you’re middle aged when you’re stoked your preferred floss brand is avalaible.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

I got both inextricably excited about buying new glass Tupperware and I pulled a vein in my neck just by looking up today.

Never felt more middle aged.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

My wife, urgently, gives our kids a dozen pieces of medical advice a day- almost all ignored. I say nothing.

Today, my eldest son (3) was queasy. I yelled “Don’t take a big sip of water”. He sat terrified. Now he asks every time he drinks water if he can take a “big sip”.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

On the potential of the boys Christmas concert outfits getting dirty at breakfast:

Gabby: If they get a little dirty who cares? I’m cool, I’m good.

Me: I feel less safe than if you openly freaked out.

I know a trap when I see one.

#trustissues #thedad @thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Gabby: Maybe you should sit with the children.

I go sit down with the children.

Me: Boys let me teach you how to live.

Seth: I like french fries

Seth is actually teaching me how to live.

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

While wrestling with the kids:

Me: Ouch- Seth that hurt, you slammed a car into my throat!

Seth: That wasn’t a car, that was a hyena!

Somehow - that makes it better.

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Today, my son, Seth asked a girl in school if she would like a cappuccino.

3 years of training completed.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Tonight Gabby I discussed altering our diets… it did not go well.

To Gabby: “Tell me more. I want to hear more about my new diet. I also really want to by cynical about it.”

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

After exhausting every known means to get our kids to stop coughing, today I told them they were allowed to cough.

It’s been just as effective.

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Yesterday, I had to explain to my sons why they shouldn’t lick each other.

Some stellar parenting here.

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Upon returning from vacation,
Me: I’m gonna throw out the broken Tupperware (that we broke right before leaving)
Gabby: That’s still broken?
Me: Yup, funny enough it didn’t get fixed while we were gone…I had the elves on it but…

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Me: Are you still working on your foggy bottom?

Gabby: My London Fog?

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Us: Seth what is a vacation?

Seth: We’re going to see toys, and games, and people.

Couldn’t say it better myself.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Me: Seth remember it’s your vacation too.

Seth: Oh, yay!

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

(Seth finished licking the icing off a cupcake)
Seth: Hey! It’s empty!
(Hands cupcake to me)

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Seth: Story about cookies!
Me: There was a chocolate chip cookie named Chip. He smelled good.
Seth: Seth eats the cookie!
Me: You ate Chip?
Seth: Yes.
Me: Is Chip dead?
Seth: Chip is dead.

@thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

From yesterday:
Seth: (holding a book) I bring this.
Me: We can’t bring it to the party.
Seth: (side tosses it at the couch to leave behind)
Me: Thank you for the complete and immediate obedience.

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

(Going to play with magnet tiles)
Me: We’re going to build the biggest tower the world has ever seen! Are you in or out?
Seth: I’m out.

@thedad #thedad

[Adam Yaros @AdamYaros]

Seth: Story of Peter Rabbit!
Me: Peter Rabbit went into Farmer McGregor’s garden and started eating his vegetables. Then Farmer McGregor hit him with a rake and baked him in a pie and ate him for dinner.
Seth: Wow! That’s amazing!

#peterrabbit