Ajay Joseph

FAU ‘22

[Ajay Joseph @Ajay_Joseph27]

Penguins can't fly, I can't fly...
Therefore, I am a penguin🐧

[Esteban Ocon @OconEsteban]

🕷️🕸️

[Seton Hall Student @sacketology]

Jar Jar Binks calling someone a bitch

[Brian Ross @brewmeone]

Australians watching their team go down 0-2 to Team USA…

[Selene Mariposa @Selene_Mariposa]

The World Cup has turned America into a discovery channel for the rest of the world.

And they are not handling it well.
In the best possible way.

Here is what they are discovering:

Free public restrooms. Europeans pay every time.
Free water at every restaurant. Just appears.
Free refills. Coffee. Sodas. Iced tea. Unlimited.
Free chips and salsa before you even order.
Free warm bread with dinner.
Ice in drinks like civilized people.
Air conditioning everywhere. Not a moral debate. A fact.
Parking lots attached to the actual place you are going.
Drive throughs where the food comes to the car while you sit in it.
Ranch dressing by the gallon.
Tex-Mex that cannot be explained only experienced.
Dental care that actually works.
Buccee’s. There are no words for Buccee’s.

Then they found the grocery stores.

Five of them within one mile.
Each one the size of an aircraft hangar.
Burgers. Steaks. Brisket. Ribs. Pulled pork. Lamb. Veal. Every cut of every animal ever domesticated by human civilization available in one refrigerated aisle at ten in the morning on a Tuesday.

The Germans stood in the meat section for forty five minutes.
In silence.
Processing.

They finally understand why we do not have trains.

We have roads wide enough for the cars we actually drive.
Parking lots the size of small European countries.
Airports in every city worth visiting.

Why would we need trains.

The Germans are taking ranch home by the bottle.
The Dutch found queso and briefly lost the ability to speak.
The Japanese are photographing HEB like it is the Louvre.
The Czechs are weeping in West, Texas.

Welcome to America.
Everything is free, enormous, air conditioned, comes with chips, and has five grocery stores within a mile that will sell you any cut of any animal you have ever imagined.

Write that down. 🦋

[QBgami @QBgami]

Just realized the Europeans will be present to watch Joey Chestnut inhale 84 pork pistols on live television in honor of our nation’s independence.

That one will break them completely.

[GhettoGronk @ghetto_gronk]

The Dolphins to Josh Allen

[big content guy @bigcontentguy]

there’s two types of white running backs. cerebral thinkers like mccaffrey and then just absolute crayon eaters like skattebo. it rules

[Sean Strickland @SStricklandMMA]

I almost dropped the hard E-R in anger for the first time in years...

Im at a red light and these crack heads pull up to me with a broken windshield trying to fight me unprovoked. They drove away

I felt it.... but I said no Satan not today and called them a bitch instead.

[Mads @europemaxxed]

LEBRON OUTLASTED SKYPE

[Miami Dolphins @MiamiDolphins]

Etched in history.

Zach Thomas is officially a Hall of Famer. 🙌

[Formula 1 @F1]

#F1DriverOfTheDay

It could only be Seb 😍

#AbuDhabiGP @salesforce

[F1 TROLL @f1trollofficial]

F1 drivers when the race is in Texas

[z ･ﾟ: * @DAILYDOSEDR3]

‘mclaren failed to extract the potential that daniel has’ - sebastian vettel

‘as for ricciardo, he deserves to stay in f1, he still has so much to give.’ - lewis hamilton

them >>

[F1 TROLL @f1trollofficial]

Daniel Ricciardo currently holds the most important F1 record

[Miami Dolphins @MiamiDolphins]

🤳 @MelvinIngram checking in!