Zulu Alitspa

Author, animator, and illustrator of the /lit/ renaissance. Follow me across a stream through the scene into your dreams of heaven's memes and rhymes o' thre...

[HYPERPASTORALISM @hyperpastoral]

we never lock our doors around here

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@ToxicZoomer Post like these make way more sense when you realize the people involved are fat

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

Some people are predicting there's going to be a Civil War. Well, what do you "predict" will happen after the Civil War? Everything Everywhere All At Once? Some sort of Green Knight?

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@NoHylics69 Anyone else think the first word on the left column was something else?

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

My grandfather lived to be 98 and never stopped drinking his coffee out of an old bean can and reading the daily paper.

One day I went to visit and asked him his secret to maximizing audience engagement on X.

He folded down his newspaper, took a sip from his bean can, and said:

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@AdemLuz @dnlklr Go to hell

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@EOpsych You stupid bitch

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@AdemLuz I actually only watched 5 minutes of it and then turned on Glenngary Glen Ross and self-inserted as Roma.

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@whereicy Steve Irwin was a saint

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@HashtagGriswold >tfw she habitually consumes hamburger sandwiches

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@MrMachoMog @KILLTOPARTY When I was that age I wanted to believe in Jedi so much that I interpreted every event in my life in terms of “could this signify that Star Wars is real?” the same way as an adult I can’t help but ask “does this mean she wants to fuck?”

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

The total population of all Devil’s Hole Pupfish could be eaten in one meal

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

If one of my posts got popular it would completely fuck my life up

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@TheCinesthetic I would kill for this book to get a Netflix miniseries adaptation where Kevin Costner cameos and says he was famous once, sorta…

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@Citizen_cone Sounds like a legitimately entertaining exercise in misplaced pathos. Post an excerpt

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

@PokeMarr imo from my experience with lucid dreaming it's likely only five minutes passed of him sitting on the couch, everything else was just dream memories retroactively generated to justify what he was seeing

the "lamp" was most likely just the sun seen from behind his eyelids

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

The reason you stare at your phone all day after work is the same reason your grandparents used to sit out on the porch and watch the road after work.

Yes, it’s boring, but if something interesting were to actually happen, this is where it would happen at.

[Zulu Alitspa @AlitspaZ]

When is Mike Meyers gonna do a “dark and gritty” reboot of Austin Powers to make fun of Daniel Craig?