AllisonMariee13 🦇

Damaged people are dangerous. we know how to make hell feel like home. (profile pic by @/abbitofink on IG)

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Wait. The wolves AND the Wild won? At home? And advanced to the next round?

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

@crumbl 🦙

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

My baby slept for almost 7 hours last night. I feel like I shouldn’t complain but I’m a worrier. So I’m worried he’s sick or something. So. There’s that.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Jeff Goldblum in Independence Day.

That’s it. That’s the tweet.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Feeling superbly depressed because I only get 8 weeks paid STD off from work for having my baby, and one of those weeks has been robbed from me as he sits in the NICU. They said he might come home end of April. So then that’s 4 weeks of my 8 without him home. Ugh.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

I really just lay awake all night crying to myself. I just want my baby to come home. I want to be tired and sore and grumpy and sleep deprived. I don’t like this NICU crap. Ughhhhh

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Not me sobbing because I have to go home soon, and it’ll be without my baby 😭 and then I had to miss my other baby’s birthday today. Ugh I’m a mess.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

I’m so mad at myself because I’m 99% sure I saw @cjham28 at Hyvee yesterday and my ass was like “ain’t no way” and I didn’t say a damn thing 😂 but the more I sit here I’m like IT HAD TO BE HIM.

[U.S. Bank Stadium @usbankstadium]

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[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Not my almost 8 month pregnant ass looking at tickets for @HardyMusic for literally a week before I’m gonna birth a child because I love my man and I want to surprise him. My luck the damn baby will come that night. But he loves Hardy so much 😭

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

I know you said take it easy this weekend since I was having contractions and shit on Friday but easy is not in my vocabulary. Got bubba switched to a new room. Crib is almost up. Baby’s room is almost put together. I’m a mom on a mission goddamnit

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Whew. Bro I think I’m nesting or something. All the laundry in the house was done and put away. One load left in the washer and I am switching it. I cleaned out two toy rooms. I cleaned the kitchen. I loaded and unloaded the dishwasher.

Lao if you’re my Dr seeing this sorry 😂

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Get you a ma that when you say “got this appointment today and it’s got me all nervous because idk what to expect” he takes off work early to make sure he can come with you. Even though it’ll be the most boring hour-hour and a half of his life. 🫶🏼

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Listen. I know I’m only 32 weeks pregnant. Barely 32 weeks. But goddamn this baby ready to come up out of here.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Started my day snuggling with hubby and bubba (and the dogs) in bed. Little bedroom painting. Target and fleet farm trip. This has been one of my favorite valentines days 😊

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Enrolling kids in preschool and for their first months in daycare. Whew. This momma isn’t ready for this.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

I love the ICE came to my mothers place of employment and the first words out of everyone’s mouth in the group chat was “DIANE KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT” map like damn. Dee really is that bitch though.

I told her to start locking doors and telling them to eat shit but cool cool.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Nothing prepares you for the hard hitting questions your kid asks at bedtime.

Tonight my baby, almost 4 years of age and wide behind his years, asked

“Mama, why do we do if our friends ask to pick our nose”

Whew. Motherhood is a trip.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

Name someone who is more excited about getting a @Cristiano jersey 😂 Beckham had the best Christmas ever.

[AllisonMariee13 🦇 @AllisonMariee13]

It’s surreal to sit here. In bed. Next to a man who loves me so effortlessly. Remembering all of the nights I’d cry myself to sleep begging for a man to treat me a half as well as I am treated now. Feeling incredibly grateful for my husband lately. So fucking lucky 🫶🏼