The Almighty Sage

A very, very wise man

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@PFTCommenter AI slop

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@JeffNadu Are you circumcised?

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

What are your thoughts on Mitt Romney? @jimmyswruk

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@BarstoolBigCat What’s crazy is that this could have (and should have) been a technical and prob would’ve cost them the game. I’m glad it wasn’t a T but that’s crazy by Hurley lmao. In his defense, he may have thought the game was over but still 😂

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

It was an exhibition game who cares @WBCBaseball

[Killa 🌺 @KillaKreww]

Comedian Matt Rife explains how SHOCKED he was when his Mom wanted him to buy her a $3.5 million house when he first started getting money 💀😭🏠

“Mom I love you, but you’re White trash”

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@boatright @jontaffer @elonmusk @grok It’s actually the most watched show of all time, nice try clown

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

I thought the 23 And Me was a load of crap when it came back that I was 85% Sudanese but maybe it was accurate after all

[Global Statistics @Globalstats11]

Average Erect Penis Size by Country 🍌

🇸🇩 Sudan - 17.95 cm - 7.1 inch
🇨🇩 DR Congo - 17.93 cm - 7.1 inch
🇪🇨 Ecuador - 17.59 cm - 6.9 inch
🇬🇭 Ghana - 17.31 cm - 6.8 inch
🇳🇬 Nigeria - 17.00 cm - 6.7 inch
🇻🇪 Venezuela - 16.93 cm - 6.7 inch
🇱🇧 Lebanon - 16.82 cm - 6.6 inch
🇨🇴 Colombia - 16.75 cm - 6.6 inch
🇨🇲 Cameroon - 16.65 cm - 6.6 inch
🇯🇲 Jamaica - 16.30 cm - 6.4 inch
🇰🇪 Kenya - 16.28 cm - 6.4 inch
🇸🇳 Senegal - 15.89 cm - 6.3 inch
🇨🇺 Cuba - 15.87 cm - 6.2 inch
🇳🇿 New Zealand - 15.73 cm - 6.2 inch
🇿🇲 Zambia - 15.78 cm - 6.2 inch
🇧🇿 Belize - 15.75 cm - 6.2 inch
🇦🇴 Angola - 15.73 cm - 6.2 inch
🇧🇷 Brazil - 15.70 cm - 6.2 inch
🇦🇺 Australia - 15.70 cm - 6.2 inch
🇿🇼 Zimbabwe - 15.68 cm - 6.2 inch
🇳🇱 Netherlands - 15.60 cm - 6.1 inch
🇵🇾 Paraguay - 15.53 cm - 6.1 inch
🇵🇦 Panama - 15.49 cm - 6.1 inch
🇵🇱 Poland - 15.41 cm - 6.1 inch
🇹🇩 Chad - 15.39 cm - 6.1 inch
🇸🇪 Sweden - 15.36 cm - 6.0 inch
🇿🇦 South Africa - 15.29 cm - 6.0 inch
🇨🇮 Ivory Coast - 15.22 cm - 6.0 inch
🇧🇪 Belgium - 15.14 cm - 6.0 inch
🇵🇹 Portugal - 15.14 cm - 6.0 inch
🇵🇪 Peru - 15.07 cm - 5.9 inch
🇩🇰 Denmark - 15.07 cm - 5.9 inch
🇬🇲 Gambia - 15.07 cm - 5.9 inch
🇦🇷 Argentina - 14.88 cm - 5.9 inch
🇷🇸 Serbia - 14.87 cm - 5.8 inch
🇭🇷 Croatia - 14.77 cm - 5.8 inch
🇬🇾 Guyana - 14.75 cm - 5.8 inch
🇦🇹 Austria - 14.69 cm - 5.8 inch
🇱🇻 Latvia - 14.69 cm - 5.8 inch
🇭🇺 Hungary - 14.68 cm - 5.8 inch
🇺🇾 Uruguay - 14.67 cm - 5.8 inch
🇧🇬 Bulgaria - 14.66 cm - 5.8 inch
🇹🇳 Tunisia - 14.61 cm - 5.8 inch
🇨🇱 Chile - 14.59 cm - 5.7 inch
🇮🇸 Iceland - 14.56 cm - 5.7 inch
🇱🇹 Lithuania - 14.55 cm - 5.7 inch
🇫🇷 France - 14.50 cm - 5.7 inch
🇩🇿 Algeria - 14.49 cm - 5.7 inch
🇩🇪 Germany - 14.48 cm - 5.7 inch
🇪🇷 Eritrea - 14.39 cm - 5.7 inch
🇳🇴 Norway - 14.34 cm - 5.6 inch
🇬🇧 UK - 14.30 cm - 5.6 inch
🇨🇭 Switzerland - 14.25 cm - 5.6 inch
🇺🇦 Ukraine - 14.25 cm - 5.6 inch
🇸🇮 Slovenia - 14.13 cm - 5.6 inch
🇦🇱 Albania - 14.19 cm - 5.6 inch
🇨🇿 Czechia - 14.07 cm - 5.5 inch
🇪🇪 Estonia - 14.01 cm - 5.5 inch
🇺🇸 USA - 13.95 cm - 5.5 inch
🇲🇽 Mexico - 13.92 cm - 5.5 inch
🇨🇻 Cape Verde - 13.85 cm - 5.5 inch
🇸🇰 Slovakia - 13.81 cm - 5.4 inch
🇧🇾 Belarus - 13.80 cm - 5.4 inch
🇨🇦 Canada - 13.80 cm - 5.4 inch
🇬🇪 Georgia - 13.57 cm - 5.3 inch
🇬🇱 Greenland - 13.57 cm - 5.3 inch
🇲🇦 Morocco - 13.50 cm - 5.3 inch
🇪🇬 Egypt - 13.35 cm - 5.3 inch
🇱🇺 Luxembourg - 13.32 cm - 5.2 inch
🇨🇷 Costa Rica - 13.31 cm - 5.2 inch
🇲🇾 Malaysia - 13.29 cm - 5.2 inch
🇦🇿 Azerbaijan - 13.12 cm - 5.2 inch
🇹🇷 Turkey - 13.11 cm - 5.2 inch
🇦🇫 Afghanistan - 13.10 cm - 5.2 inch
🇮🇱 Israel - 13.00 cm - 5.1 inch
🇫🇮 Finland - 12.98 cm - 5.1 inch
🇪🇸 Spain - 12.98 cm - 5.1 inch
🇪🇹 Ethiopia - 12.93 cm - 5.1 inch
🇯🇴 Jordan - 12.90 cm - 5.1 inch
🇰🇿 Kazakhstan - 12.44 cm - 4.9 inch
🇺🇿 Uzbekistan - 12.43 cm - 4.9 inch
🇬🇹 Guatemala - 12.24 cm - 4.8 inch
🇦🇲 Armenia - 12.10 cm - 4.8 inch
🇨🇾 Cyprus - 12.02 cm - 4.7 inch
🇮🇳 India - 11.93 cm - 4.7 inch
🇧🇭 Bahrain - 11.93 cm - 4.7 inch
🇨🇳 China - 11.90 cm - 4.7 inch
🇴🇲 Oman - 11.85 cm - 4.7 inch
🇮🇪 Ireland - 11.79 cm - 4.6 inch
🇲🇳 Mongolia - 11.77 cm - 4.6 inch
🇷🇴 Romania - 11.73 cm - 4.6 inch
🇸🇻 El Salvador - 11.71 cm - 4.6 inch
🇯🇵 Japan - 11.60 cm - 4.6 inch
🇦🇪 UAE - 11.54 cm - 4.5 inch
🇮🇹 Italy - 11.50 cm - 4.5 inch
🇹🇼 Taiwan - 11.50 cm - 4.5 inch
🇶🇦 Qatar - 11.41 cm - 4.5 inch
🇸🇦 Saudi Arabia - 11.40 cm - 4.5 inch
🇭🇳 Honduras - 11.40 cm - 4.5 inch
🇬🇷 Greece - 11.30 cm - 4.4 inch
🇮🇩 Indonesia - 11.07 cm - 4.4 inch
🇮🇷 Iran - 11.04 cm - 4.3 inch
🇹🇿 Tanzania - 11.02 cm - 4.3 inch
🇵🇰 Pakistan - 11.01 cm - 4.3 inch
🇰🇼 Kuwait - 10.85 cm - 4.3 inch
🇧🇩 Bangladesh - 10.80 cm - 4.3 inch
🇭🇰 Hong Kong - 10.75 cm - 4.2 inch
🇸🇬 Singapore - 10.75 cm - 4.2 inch
🇵🇭 Philippines - 10.65 cm - 4.2 inch
🇰🇷 South Korea - 10.50 cm - 4.1 inch
🇱🇰 Sri Lanka - 10.16 cm - 4.0 inch
🇻🇳 Vietnam - 10.15 cm - 4.0 inch
🇲🇲 Myanmar - 10.10 cm - 4.0 inch
🇳🇵 Nepal - 9.51 cm - 3.7 inch
🇰🇭 Cambodia - 8.91 cm - 3.5 inch
🇰🇵 North Korea - 8.60 cm - 3.4 inch
🇹🇭 Thailand - 8.43 cm - 3.3 inch

Note: Selected countries only.

Source: World Population Review

[Memes @PardonMyMeme]

6,800 retweets and Zac will do mayo socks

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

I like when onions make me cry. Makes me feel like I’m capable of feeling something. Anything

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

I didn’t know you got down like that @notthefakeSVP , beautiful

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

Why do fish sticks get such a bad rap? Especially compared to chicken nuggets? They’re the same in principle. #thinkwithme

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@GovTimWalz Thank you Tim for everything you have done! Best governor in AMERICAN HISTORY! Will be voting for you on the 2028 presidential ticket

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

There’s this guy at my gym that walks around the gym floor between sets I guess to stay warm idk but it really pisses me off. Is there anything we can do about this @RobertKennedyJr ?

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@Wyattzander7 @josh_uglyasf That’s sick we would fucking own the room too

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

Go Birds!!!

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@Eagles @PondLehocky I’m a die hard fan but we gotta stop with this dumbass nickname. Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

I boycott @NFL games on @amazon because I hate it that much. I am watching the Phillies rain delay instead

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

@godpropgod Wowww welcome to the brotherhood!

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

Haha word up!!

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

GOOOO BIRDS! @dak pussy @MicahhParsons11 thank you @KamalaHarris sorry ass lmao

[The Almighty Sage @AlmightySage69]

Looking sick bro!!