idiot sandwich

i'm not like other girls, i'm worse

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

zios pizza literally made the best commercial of all time fr https://t.co/xaOi5AOxJ7

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

no one:

my brain: take this guy to zios pizza in omaha nebraska! ᵗʳʸ ᵗʰᵉ ᶜʰᶦᶜᵏᵉⁿ ᵖᵉˢᵗᵒ

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

u can move a thousand miles away from omaha nebraska and you will still somehow meet someone from there and they will immediately ask you what high school you went to…. sir u are 28 PLEASE

[777 @_garrettcharles]

you were not a teenage dirtbag you were a gleek……

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

omaha is extremely lame

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

do mini m&ms taste better than regular ones

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

no political discourse is funnier than conservative men blaming glee for the downfall of society

[Jack Posobiec @JackPosobiec]

BREAKING:

Hollywood Consultant Admits 'Glee' Started the Wokeness Epidemic

@HumanEvents https://t.co/iJoAMwzLMn

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

growing up is realizing harry potter literally did what half of ur midwest high school did…. married his high school sweetheart and becoming a cop

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

@yesimquirky therapy

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

did anyone else have an intense fear of the supervolcano under yellowstone imploding at any moment as a child or was that just me

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

Does My Tummy Hurt Because I Am Anxious or Am I Anxious Because My Tummy Hurts

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

why is it so embarrassing to connect w my literal coworkers on linkedin

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

the most divorced dad energy thing my dad does is make broccoli and cheese by microwaving a piece of kraft american cheese over frozen broccoli

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

dating in dc is weird bc a guy just said he might not be able to go on our date tomorrow because joe biden has an event nearby and he won’t be allowed to leave his apartment

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

yes, i'm a girl. yes, i play video games🙄

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

@AnnieAlbin the major flaw of therapy is that the mentally ill bitches (us) have to ASK for help like we don't think our existence is inconvenient on everyone around us already 😭😭😭😭

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

my fav part of therapy is definitely when my therapist asks me about what has happened since I last saw them and I realize I Do Not Have A Single Memory Of The Last Week

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

lets be clear: if UNL DOES decide to ban FIJI, it's only going to be to protect their image. not out of concern for students wellbeing.

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

Rather than being placed in safe environments when they go to school, we are told to not hang out with certain frats and to cover our drinks. The "college experience" for women is to ensure our own safety at all times, because universities continue to perpetuate rape culture.

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

FIJI isn't the only problem. I've heard countless stories of firsthand experiences at half of the fraternities at UNL. The school has never taken SA seriously, which is why most women don't report. The culture at UNL is gross and unsafe for women.

[idiot sandwich @AlyssaJoness]

On bid day, frats will literally stand in mobs outside of their houses to watch girls running to their sororities, openly making freshman feel like prey. This is something we were expected to ignore and shows how overt predatory behavior on campus is just ignored.