Captain Amazaling

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

New era, same Captain.
From now on, this account is:
80s nostalgia that doesn’t suck
Dad jokes without the dad bod (or kids)
Gentle reminders that your boss is soulless and your favorite guru still can’t afford the Lambo in his thumbnails. Strap in. Daily smiles, zero ragebait.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@miles_commodore This reminds me of Hannity.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@LangmanVince Indie found the Ark. Not the Nazis. She's wrong.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@sofiatieger Toothpicks with wood glue work great and are super easy to do.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@JMorris817 @Hot_Pepper76 🤣

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@saltynutbutter @BLackgold_5 I was grumpy, and you just made me laugh out loud. Thank you!

[Wholesome Side of 𝕏 @itsme_urstruly]

This is how she got asked to the school dance. 😂

When the dad is laughing you know you did it right. ❤️

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@miles_commodore 🤣

[Jeff Dye @JeffDye]

😂. Who made this. This is great.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@JohnnyLCKai Who would have guessed that he would become the cream of the crop? Dig it!

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

One more day until Christmas!

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@hatch_willow @otokyo I didn't even know that was a thing. Now I need to find some.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@JohnnyLCKai I saw this on a Gilligan's Island documentary.
Mary Ann received the most fan mail.
Ginger received the most perverted.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@interesting_aIl Now I want to be a farmer. E-I-E-I-O

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@miles_commodore https://t.co/HH6xKEsYPQ Joy to the World performed by the United States Air Force Band. It's Amazaling.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

USAF Flash Mob at the National Air Force and Space Museum.
It's outstanding. It's just what you need to get in the Christmas Spirit.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

Dogs are the best.

[Clown World ™ 🤡 @ClownWorld]

Big boy

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

Tried to teach my cat about budgeting.
She stared at me, knocked my coffee over, and demanded tuna.
Guess she’s the CFO now.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

My cat just knocked over a $200 vase and looked directly at me like, “Why would you put that in my way?” Rent is due in five days and she's already acting like she owns the place.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@FirearmFury I think I would want a Minigun.

[Captain Amazaling @Amazaling]

@thegypsysoul42 @FastbreakHoops5

[Chad Crowley @CCrowley100]

Never forgive. Never forget.