DIVORCE AGREEMENT
THIS IS INCREDIBLY WELL-PUT, AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S WRITTEN BY A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950s for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.
Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.
Here is our separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by land mass, each taking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets, since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
—We don't like redistributive taxes, so you can keep them.
--You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.
--Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.
--We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and you can go with wind, solar, and bio-diesel.
--You can keep Oprah, Whoopi, Bill Maher, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all five of them.
--We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street.
--You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, homeless, homeboys, hippies, druggies, and illegal aliens.
--We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEOs, and rednecks.
--We'll keep Bill O’Reilly and Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
--You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.
--You can have the peaceniks and war protesters.
--When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.
--We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.
--You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness, and Shirley McLaine. You can also have the UN., but we will no longer be paying the bill.
--We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Volt and Leaf you can find.
--You can give everyone health care if you can find any practicing doctors.
--We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and "The National Anthem."
--I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute "Imagine," "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing," "Kum Baya," or "We Are the World."
--We'll practice trickle-down economics and you can continue to give trickle-up poverty your best shot.
--Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name, and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like-minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you might think about which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P.S. Also, please take George Clooney, Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin Short, Charlie Sheen, Barbra Streisand, and (Hanoi) Jane Fonda with you.
P.P.S. And you won't have to press 1 for English when you call our country.
Forward This Every Time You Get It !
Let's Keep This Going, Maybe Some Of It Will Start Sink in.
So let me get this straight;
The left tried to assassinate President Trump at least 3 times over the past two years, and murdered Charlie Kirk in cold blood....
....And won the midterms in a LANDSLIDE.
Who says violence doesn't solve anything...
The newer generations are unemployable, so I shut down a business yesterday.
I have many small businesses I got involved in, one is a Saltwater fish store. It sells fish, corals, aquariums etc.
The most profitable part of one of these stores is outside Maintenance. Going to peoples houses, changing the fish tanks water, cleaning glass etc.
This is a very simple job, you run a hose in from the truck, suck water out, pump water in (nothing manual), and use a magnetic razor blade to clean the glass. Take a water sample and leave.
We had 4 trucks and 6 guys doing this... then 5, 4, 3... each person that quit put more work on the ones left.
We tried to hire, it's a very low skill job. Most maintenance guys make $15-18 an hour. We went upto $35 an hour to try and get people. Beyond that we cannot be profitable.
The job is easy, you have to have a license (actually hard as hell apparently), and pass a background check (youre in peoples homes, also hard as hell). Pass a drug test.
At $35 an hour we got the following.
Someone that caused almost 8k of damage when they started pumping in water, went out "for a smoke" and the tank overflowed.
At least 5 hires that went through background tests, drug tests etc then didn't show for work the 1st day and never called us again.
Someone that intentionally pulled the guard off the water pumping hose, and sucked someones fish into the pump.
Someone that scratched the District Attourney of las vegas, Steve Wolfson's tank by deciding to not use the magnetic razor, and "do it by hand"... fo no fucking reason. (4k bill)
A wrecked van
Someone who stole our water tester (1500 dollar machine).
I have no empathy, at least in Las Vegas, for people complaining about no work, no jobs blah blah blah.
$6000 a month to put hoses in and out of a tank and look at pretty fish.
Im not sure if you own or have ever owned a business, and I dont say that as a knock, I only say it as understanding your statement a bit.
But I can only speak to what I have, which is a small businesses (not a large conglomerate corporation), with around 24 employees at the moment.
I have employed people since I was 19, and im now 52, so 33 years of running my own small businesses and meeting payroll every two weeks.
My average wages are up just under 70% in the past 6 years, since we decided that it was a great idea to literally 'blow everything up' from the idiocy of our covid actions.
My food and supply cost are way up as well, but nowhere near 70%.
Labor and Food costs have ALWAYS been the two main drivers of costs to a restaurant business, but were much more in line pre covid retardation.
Its turned into a vicious cycle of paying more for entry to low level labor to be able to at least BARELY staff ones restaurant, then to have to raise prices to cover the addit labor costs, to the entry/low level workers now paying more for day to day needs, to them demanding more money to cover their needs, to us raising hourly wages, to us then increasing prices, etc... You see what im saying, im sure.
Only to then have the pubic bitching to us, the busines, for constant rising prices.
Im a white dude, 52.
I grew up in the hood. I talked like this, probably even worse.
I moved out when I was 30.. Met my now wife.
She always remarks how my speech 'changes' to hood talked, when we happen to go back to my old neighborhood.
I didn't realize that I did it, but I do
@Abomination81 Then you have those people who love to say 'well, pay your workers better!' from one side of their mouths and are the first to complain about the higher prices from the other side!
Personally, I think Trump was mislead (duped) into thinking that this was going to be pretty easy;
- we go in, take everything out, the Iranian people will rise up and rebel against the mullahs with our backing and support, Iran goes back to the Iran it was pre 79' Revolution
Problem obviously was that the Iranian people had zero desire to play their part we were assured they would.