sam and ella

A soliloquy of a woman scorned

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Does anyone else’s mother say “bedaytas” instead of potatoes?

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

New brides be changing that social media username quicker than their knickers

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

3 things guaranteed in this life; death, taxes and never being called in on time in the dentist

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

We ride at dawn for Charleen #loveislanduk

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

“He’s in it for a few snogs and a mocktail” is the best line of the season #loveislanduk

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Get Simba off my screen please I couldn’t care less #loveislanduk

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Can I ask who is getting red bull/monster spritzers from the coffee trailers?

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Lads I am SWELT

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

FREE JASMINE #loveislanduk

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Simba storming off like a 40 year old nurse coming off night shift #loveislanduk

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

I need someone to give me their log ins for pretty much everything

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

All this hantavirus chatter got me wanting to watch Ratatouille fr

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

And to be honest with you, I’m starting my day with a Rennie just for fun more so

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

I’m personally gonna be bringing back the saying “I don’t give a rat’s arse” because - hilarious. You can all do whatever you want though, I don’t give a rat’s arse

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

There’s no way on god’s green earth I’m carrying a baby for 9 months, pushing it out my cooter for it to turn around and have it’s first words be ‘dada’ ???? FUCK YOU

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Something about men wishing women a happy international women’s day doesn’t sit right with me. Don’t involve yourself

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Writing “clean me” in the dirt on the back of a van is the ultimate joke

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

I know I’ll be single forever cos there’s no way I’m mingling with your stupid friends and family

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

I don’t want flowers. I want to add your card to my Apple Pay

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Ronan was so right with life being like a rollercoaster

[sam and ella @AmyOReilly4]

Just seen a bald man going into the barber? What you going in for? A chat?