joey gorman

H.G. Blob

[Patrick Gorman MP @PatrickGormanMP]

Meet Doctor Ron Gorman 🎓.

Today my dad was recognised as an honorary Doctor of Education by Edith Cowan University.

In his speech he said “My focus will be ‘that teaching is political – it creates, for all children and young people, opportunity in life and carries our planet into a positive future for all.”

So proud.

[The Spence @adambspencer]

When it comes to the Diabolically Awful Customer Experience of Fame I’d suggest whomever created @myGovau is an automatic entry

1. The split btw MyGov & MyGovID

2. The two aforementioned sites / apps bouncing you back and forth between them

3. An orgy of 4 / 6 digit codes

👻

[Julian O'Shea @julianoshea]

Here’s how cities fight the war on skateboarders.

[theMusic.com.au @TheMusicComAu]

Why @triplej is currently playing 'Treaty' on repeat https://t.co/65WiGtVIZZ

[Bo Bannie ⚪️🔴 @anniedundun]

Just a reminder that the No voters get nothing from tonight. Their lives will still be fucking miserable on Monday. 🙏

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Number of shirt sleeves = number of arms in the band = Rock show.

Number of shirt sleeves < number of arms in the band = Punk show.

Number of shirt sleeves > than number of arms in the band = Def Leopard show.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

If Rio Tinto apply the same diligence to finding this radioactive capsule as they do to their mining operations, there’s every chance they will accidentally blow up the art gallery of Western Australia in the process.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

“Don't ever say it's over if I'm breathin'
Racin' to the moonlight and I'm speedin'
I'm headed to the stars, ready to go far
I'm star Walken”

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

It’s not to late, get Clint to Brazil asap.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Brazil’s impending civil war would be much funnier if Clint from heartbreak island hosted it.
Kiwi accent: “So Brazil, in tonight’s passion play you have the option to stay or stray. South, do want to stay with North or stray with a new government.”
*suspenseful music intensifies

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Silly Goose? SILLY GOOSE!!
Have you met a goose? Those guys are all loose units. Real mad cunts. Each and everyone of them. Like gregarious loud drunks on a baller of a night out.
Silly for a goose is being hard working, well mannered, polite and in any way predictable.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

This year is as far from the release of ‘Bootylicious’ as Bootylicious’ was from the release of ‘Edge of Seventeen’.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Homing pigeons are really the ultimate millennial icon.
Give them the smallest task and they immediately want to go home and have a little snooze.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Kenny Rogers ‘The Gambler’ doesn’t actually include any discernible gambling advice, just a strategy to steal another man’s whisky.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

West Australia’s friendships and common connections with other states:
QLD: Also big and hot, friend.
SA: Hey neighbour, friend.
NSW:
VIC: Wooo! Football, friend.
TAS: They forget you exist as well?, friend.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Proverb: There are two wolves inside of you…

Me: “Wolves are social, sweet!”

Proverb, now annoyed: Ok, there’s one Simon & Garfunkel inside you.

Me: “oh shit. This is bad.”

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

I’m no particular order, these are my three favourite political messages musicians have put on their guitars.
Woody Guthrie - “this machine kills fascists”
Chris Isaak - “Chris Isaak”
Tom Morello - “arm the homeless”

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

I feel like we are all sleeping on the fact that Lisa Simpson wrote one of the all time great union songs.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Safe and on to her new adventure!

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

“She looks like she’s about to lay eggs” did not allay any of my coworkers concerns about why I was carefully rehoming a misplaced Red Back Spider.

[joey gorman @AnachieGordon]

Me, when I finally become the worlds first pop punk ghost.
Spooky ghost voice: “I’m on fire…..”
*pause
Singing ghost voice: “…..and now I think I’m ready to bust a move!”