André Marçal

And there I go jumping before the gunshot has gone off

[André Marçal @AndreCopolla]

https://t.co/jINrgmsUPW

[luca @lucam8a]

👀👀👀

[phx 💥 @phxstrikesback]

close enough

[Portal Apple TV @PortalAppleTV]

que história eh essa que o apple tv finalmente hitou?

[丶 @Justhatejossy]

"Do you all mind if we cancel?"
Me;

[☆ ★ @imfynerthanfyne]

i just called 911 accidentally and the operator picked up and asked if i’m okay. i said "yes sorry that was an accident" he hung up in my face 😭😭😭😭😭😭 now what if the killer was forcing me to say that????? he didn't even try a little bit 😭😭

[char ᢉ𐭩 @alcdec]

doomscrolling on twitter feels so much more productive than doomscrolling on tiktok bc it’s like i’m basically reading

[gabri ꕤ @physicallyxweak]

the gay spectrum😭😭😭😭😭

[Joe @JoePostingg]

Printers never work because they are an affront to God. Man was not meant to pull objects from the digital realm into the real world. Icarus is flying too close to the sun.

[autist @litteralyme0]

real

[André Marçal @AndreCopolla]

O dinheiro que você ia economizar nas promoções da Steam, você vai gastar pra comprar o console 😵🫪😞

(difícil a vida do gamer)

[Valve @valvesoftware]

Steam Machine is here, and you can sign up now:

Steam Machine 512GB
Steam Machine 2TB

Plus bundled versions with Steam Controller
Learn more and sign up here: https://t.co/dSr8sbm8db

[g @sexowrld]

advogados são tipo "vou fazer uma sustentação oral na vara do juiz"

[André Marçal @AndreCopolla]

Gente foi babado mesmo

[IGN @IGN]

Dragons! Ships! Fire! Betrayal, chaos, death and destruction... House of the Dragon's Season 3 premiere has it all.

Our review: https://t.co/vXMIv0VENX

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

I WANT YOUR LOVING AND I WANT YOUR REVENGE, YOU AND ME COULD WRITE A BAD ROMANCE

[b @wwxwashere]

brazilians don’t say “that moment made me so nervous” we say “i was so tense not even wifi would pass through my asshole” and i think that’s beautiful

[Christopher Hale @ChristopherHale]

When threatened, the pope can spray holy venom up to fifteen feet.

[Travesti que Habla 🏳️‍⚧️ @odaradeverdade]

Quando eu tô tendo um pesadelo mas lembro que eu tô no controle:

[CⱯIO @_caiodeboca]

eu tenho ódio da estética chatgpt e as pessoas tão fazendo TUDO no chatgpt convite de aniversário propaganda de comércio santinho de gente morta