Andre Hanekom

Spreading smiles on Twitter one tweet at a time. Your go-to guy for clever quips and a daily dose of humor. Here to turn your frowns upside down.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Farewell, Blue Checkmark. Here's my brief rant on why I'm done paying for it.

Initially, Twitter boosts your visibility, creating an illusion of increased engagement. But it's fleeting, a tactic that feels like brainwashing, especially for new users.

After talking to 8 others who've noticed the same, I can't justify supporting this.

So, I'm choosing to stay "unverified," but I'll keep sharing content to bring smiles.

As a fellow South African, Elon, I'm disappointed in this emotional manipulation.

#GoodbyeBlueCheckmark

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Hi everyone! Quick question for those who’ve been on this platform for a while—would you say it’s still “pay to win”?

I’d really like to come back to X, but only if I won’t get shadow banned just because I’m not paying.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@SStricklandMMA, you saw what @dricusduplessis did with crying males….

Or was it “the cut”?

“Hulle sal nooit leer nie”

#ufc #UFC305

[Sean Strickland @SStricklandMMA]

Time for war Dutch man......

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

This did not age well… #dricusduplessis

[Israel Adesanya @stylebender]

The same city I achieved my dream is the city I’ll kill his. 🪦

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@MyiStoreSA Your iStore Centurion is absolutely useless.

Elizabeth M the most rude sales representative that i came across.

I went to Vodacom directly, and they agreed that iStore is lying to me.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Was there a massive twitter bot sweep or is my content just uninteresting….

Went from 229 to below 200 in a day 🫣🫣🫣

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Ever wonder why your coffee tastes different every morning? Same beans, same machine, same sleepy barista (me). I'm starting to think my coffee maker has moods.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@stats_feed A printer ink cartridge, because at the rate they're priced now, they'll be the new gold by 2044!

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

15 years ago: "Don't get in cars with strangers."

Today: "Here's my credit card, random uber person, please take me to my next meeting."

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

When a lone wasp attacks you, it’s engaged in a epic boss fight

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@stats_feed Finding money in your pocket you forgot about is like winning the adult version of hide and seek.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@stats_feed Looks like Barbados is the real MVP with a perfect score in English. Meanwhile, China's just sitting in the language class thinking, "Do we really need this?" 🤔

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Imagine watching TV and still getting judged by your pet for not moving off the couch all day. Transparent displays, making multitasking look cooler since... well, now!

[Mashable @mashable]

LG wants to bring transparent displays to your house

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

It’s so hot in South Africa, I defrosted a chicken in the sun… and then he stood up to go lay in the shade. 🌞🐔

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

This gave me a chuckle.

Not even greeting me, not starting a conversation, nothing!

Just straight “buy my product”.

Yes, I will waste your time then.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

How can someone 'draw a blank'?

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

If you could fill a pool with something other than water, what would make the most interesting swimming experience?

My answer is Jello. Imagine the belly flops; they'd be legendary... until you have to figure out how to get out.

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

@_miloi The only thing stopping me is the 24-hour limit on a day. Seems like my clock is more into time management than I am!

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Can you ever be a closet claustrophobic?

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Start your weekend right: remember, dancing in the kitchen is still dancing!

[Andre Hanekom @AndrenHanekom]

Did you know? The most productive workday is Tuesday. Clearly, Friday didn't get the memo.