Anne Steedman

[Paul Rees. ex Rucksack. @HannahIamthest1]

A Demon approaches the Devil and says.
"Dark lord, Two men from Glasgow have been sent here. What should be done with them?"
The Devil says. "Glaswegians? Their kind and are normally very friendly, helpful and honest, so we do not see many such men in my dark domain. Hang them in a cage over the lake of fire for now and I shall check on them later."
But when the Devil flew up to the cage to check on the Scotsmen, he found them happily lounging around with their shirts off.
"What is the meaning of this?" The Devil cried. "You're supposed to be in torment!"
The Glaswegians looked surprised. "Naw." They said. "It's pure quality taps aff weather here man. It's no drab an' dreech like Scotland, you know that way?"
Fuming, the Devil flew to the great thermostat of Hell and cranked it all the way to the top. And the next day, the temperature was so high that even the Demons were sweating, the stones of hell were melting and the flames from the lake of fire were leaping higher than ever before.
So the Devil was surprised when he visited the Scotsmen and found that they had somehow procured plastic lawn furniture and a couple of bottles of Buckfast tonic wine.
Raising a glass to the Devil, one of the Scotsmen said. "Hey big man, If I'd known it was so lovely an warm doon here, I'd've done a whole lot more sinning! Weather's always miserable in the Gorbals. Always freezin', ye know?"
"I see." The Devil replied, smiling though clenched teeth. "Your dismal country has given you a great love of heat. The hotter it is, the happier you are. Well, we'll see about that."
So he flew to the great thermostat of Hell once more, but this time, he turned it all the way down.
The next day, the lake of fire was frozen solid for the first time, sinners were frozen in blocks of ice and Demons huddled in corners for warmth, their teeth chattering.
But when the Devil visited the Scotsmen, he found them jumping for joy, tearfully cheering. "Scotland! SCOTLAND!!!"
The Devil's jaw dropped. "What? Why? How? I burn you and you are happy! I freeze you and you celebrate! What is wrong with you?"
One of Glaswegians turned back and said......
"Is it not obvious Big Man? Hell's frozen over this means Scotland's won the world cup!" 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿⚽️ 🏆 😁😁

[𝙋𝙝𝙞𝙡 𝙈𝙮𝙚𝙧𝙨 @PhilMyers53]

If people are calling for @Keir_Starmer to go, he must be doing a terrible job

And yet he isn't

Think of the mess Labour inherited

Look at the progress made in under 2 years

Look beyond the right-wing media campaign

#TenYearKeir

#TenYearKeir

Who's with me?

Retweet

[Harry Eccles @Heccles94]

Let's do it.

@GaryLineker for BBC Director General.

RT if you agree.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@moizali Scotland best for friendly banter, icy water for swimming and every bit of weather you can think of. Bring a big coat a selection of t shirts and cozy jumpers, your wellies and you will be fine.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Milajoy 15 mins max them I'm off.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Jgs_x @FIFAcom Your the best comment on here today! Well done.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@JudithRalston What's happening this morning as we are getting news and weather from London...???

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Hoang_HQ Anticipation

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Ducnghia16 Taggart

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@banks_chef They also reduce or no longer stock own brand or cheaper items. Smaller outlets only stock named brands which are always the most expensive.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@ArtyBagger @Markgatiss Watched the 1st 2 episodes tonight and thoroughly enjoyed it. Saving the nextv2 episodes for later in the week.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@MichaelRosenYes Buffalo

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@banks_chef Blue/grey/red

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Charles54121023 @speakoutsister Totally spoiled better treated than most celebrities!

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@Feargal_Sharkey My favourite Spike Milligan poem.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@PuppiesIover Twix

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@SocialistNHS I wouldn't trust him with a fresh egg!

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@JohnOSullivan36 @gomichild Followed Delhi Smith's recipe for rice and never washed it either. In a pot with a lid, whatever amount of rice, double the amount of water, bring to the boil, turn heat to as low as possible and cook until the water is no more, perfect fluffy rice every time, never fails.

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@PuppiesIover Teddy

[Anne Steedman @AnneSteedman]

@DachshundColin Notice no one is carrying his bag for him, I guess he knows he is in Scotland...