Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి

ESP (Executive Search Professional) with ESP from 1996; Out-of-Boxer; Speaker, Trainer, Writer, HR consultant to SMEs. Cooking, Driving, #StreetPhotogtapher

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Celebrating World Bicycle Day!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Did you notice that in rainy season whenever it rains it was only when the offices close in the evening!

The only we can beat this is to change office timings from 7 AM to 3 PM from July to September!!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

The Sun spends all day doing the hard work of building the storm, then goes home in the evening just before the rain starts.

Nature's version of a manager taking credit for the team's effort. 😄

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

While preparing for a training session on How to Have Difficult Conversations, I stumbled upon an unexpected discovery.

The more I read, the more questions I had.

Every article, research paper and framework seemed to open another door:

What if the other person refuses to talk?

What if they are angry?

What if the decision has already been made, such as terminating an employee?

What if the real issue lies somewhere else entirely?

I realised that difficult conversations come in different forms.

Some are discovery conversations, where both sides are trying to understand the truth.

Some are delivery conversations, where a message has to be conveyed with clarity and empathy, even if the outcome is non-negotiable.

And some are resistance conversations, where one party wants dialogue and the other does not.

One insight particularly stood out for me.

When a farmer wants to sow seeds but finds his field flooded after heavy rain, he has two choices:

1.    Wait for the water to recede.
2.    Pump the water out.

The same applies to difficult conversations.

If the other person is emotionally flooded with anger, hurt or fear, we may need to wait or prepare the ground before talking.

But there is another possibility.

Sometimes the problem is not the water.

Sometimes it is a broken canal continuously feeding the water into the field.

In human terms, the visible anger may be only a symptom. The real issue may be a deeper unmet need, unresolved frustration or long-standing misunderstanding.

Another lesson came from my own life.

Whenever I read a new concept, I instinctively search my past for situations where I have lived it.

Not because I enjoy revisiting old stories, but because real experiences test theories.

Theory tells us what ought to happen.
Life shows us what actually happened.

I've discovered that audiences respond far more strongly to stories where I was confused, wrong, uncertain or vulnerable than to polished success stories of when I was very smart, wise and aced every difficulty!

Perhaps because they see a bit of themselves in those moments.

My biggest takeaway from preparing this session?

Having a difficult conversation is not about following a script.

It is about understanding the condition of the field, identifying whether there is a broken canal and recognising that the other person may not always cooperate with the script we rehearsed.

Frameworks provide the easel.

The actual painting begins when a very human, very unpredictable person sits in front of us.

What is the most difficult conversation you've ever had to initiate?

And how did that conversation turn out?!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Did you experience this?

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

https://t.co/e8sVSjy5Jf

[Shilpa Anand @shilpaanand]

Uff. Have you seen whats happening in Odisha? Kendrapara specifically.
That's not to say we don't need more of them but such alarmism is not required.

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@Bestum_best Great. Then go and tell the stories and captivate the audience😎

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Which speaker are you?

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@hyderabaddoctor Sure Sir with your blessings.

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Travel is just what the Doctor prescribed😎

Sikkim has been on my travel radar for quite some time but isn't happening!

Incidentally my best friend and his wife are in Sikkim right now for a 6 day trip.

[Dr Sudhir Kumar MD DM @hyderabaddoctor]

If you are planning a trip to Sikkim, this post could be helpful. Bookmark this for future reference.
We visited Sikkim in the first week of May 2026, covering Gangtok, Nathu la and Lachung (North Sikkim). Our group had six people, including my parents in their 70s.
(1/n)

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Welcome to Mana Hyderabad!

By the way now that you are here how about adding Hyderabad in the @shoffr_in bio?

[Vikas Bardia @vikasbardia]

Waited for 2 hours yesterday early morning to click this pic, because I'm super excited to announce that @shoffr_in is now available in Hyderabad! 🥳

Of all the city launch requests we've gotten over the past 3 years, Hyderabad has been the most popular one perhaps because of similar airport dynamics and the quality of choices available.

We're launching today with a small fleet of 15 BYDs, and this will hopefully grow to 50 by June end. For now, I request you to please book us 1-2 days in advance (whether it's airport transfers, hourly rentals, or outstation) so that we can deliver the same gold standard ride experience to you in Hyderabad.

Most of you already know that we don't do any marketing and have only grown via word-of-mouth - this has only been possible because of your love and support, and I'm so grateful for that ❤️ Thank you again for trusting us, for giving us another chance when we've screwed up, and for constantly rooting for our growth and success!

If you've enjoyed the Shoffr experience, please share this update with your friends and family in Hyderabad 🙂 And if you're a corporate with a focus on sustainability / becoming greener, please leave a comment here or e-mail [email protected].

Launching Shoffr in Hyderabad is special for both @kislayverma and me, as this is where we first met while working at D.E. Shaw & Co way back in 2011. We both have so many fond memories (and some blurred ones) of this city, and it's amazing to see how it's developed since then. Thank you, Hyd, for all the love and opportunities you've given us - can't wait to see what's in store next!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@Narayani07 Looks like he IS managing time well.. his time!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Synchronicity!

This afternoon I was preparing for a training session on How to have difficult conversations and then this!

This post touches the very heart of difficult conversations.

The post also reminds me of a line-
"Many relationships are damaged by conversations that took place in only one person's mind."

[Shikha Bhat @Shikha_HealMind]

I caught myself doing it last week.

A client hadn't replied to my proposal in four days. By day two, I had built an entire story. They thought my rate was too high. They were going with someone cheaper. They didn't want to say it directly. By day three, I was already drafting a polite "no worries if it's not the right fit" email in my head.

Day four, they wrote back. Their father had been in the hospital. They loved the proposal. Could we start Monday.

I had spent three days having a full conversation with a version of them that did not exist. They were never in the room for it. I wrote both sides of the script, cast them as the villain, and then felt the disappointment of a rejection that never happened.

This is how most expectations actually work. We don't form them through conversation. We form them in the silence between messages, in the pause before a reply, in the meeting where someone looked distracted and we decided what it meant.

A manager assumes the new hire is disengaged because she's quiet in meetings. The new hire assumes the manager dislikes her because he never asks her opinion. Both are responding to a person they invented. Neither has said a word about it.

The gap doesn't come from people wanting different things. It comes from people deciding what the other person wants and then reacting to that decision as if it were fact. We treat our assumptions like information. They are not information. They are guesses wearing the costume of certainty.

The fix sounds almost too small to matter. Ask the actual question. Not the loaded one designed to confirm what you already believe. The plain one. "I noticed you've been quiet in meetings, is everything okay?" "I haven't heard back, I wanted to check if the timing still works." It feels exposing because it gives up the safety of the story you built. The story protected you from the answer.

Most of the friction I see between people isn't disagreement. It's two parties faithfully responding to imagined versions of each other, both convinced they are dealing with reality.

The person you are frustrated with this week, have you told them what you expected? Or did you just decide they already knew, and failed you?

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Our plumber of 20+ years cleared a clogged kitchen sink drain today.

I asked why he doesn't hire assistants as he is very busy these days

"Very few youngsters are entering this trade," he said. "And many who do don't want to clean drains. They consider it a dirty job."

It got me thinking...

Are skilled trades slowly becoming endangered professions?

Everyone wants the tap to work. Fewer people want to be the one who fixes it. 🤔

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@Sree_Cherukuri You've some very understanding friends!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Do you too have such unreliable friends?👻

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Make Maharashtrian popular and easy dish Thecha 😋

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@Sree_Cherukuri True!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

Are you?!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@Sree_Cherukuri Happy for you!

[Arunn Bhagavathula చి లిపి @ArunBee]

@soulfullysush Glad to know that