kelpcake

Florida Gulf Coast University alum

[Stacy Cay @stacycay]

Hey FBI he’s doing it again

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

If you voted for Ron Desantis, you are not allowed to talk about “golf courses.” What did you really expect would happen when you voted for someone who admittedly does not care about the environment???

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

Likewise, don’t sit in the locker room because it makes other people uncomfortable when they have to change.

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

If you come to the gym just to sit on a machine, not work out, and be on your phone just to say you went to the gym, at least sit in the lobby and don’t take up a machine

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

One of two things happen when I talk to people at work: one — I say something funny and no one hears it, and two — I say something stupid and everyone hears it

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

Me when I drop something at the gym: *Bends down with my butt to the corner so no one can see*
Me doing deadlifts: *sticks ass out as far as it will go right in the face of the guy bench pressing right behind me*

[Thought Provoking Berserker🇭🇺🇪🇺 ⚛️🦍🦅 @Provokethoughtz]

Thoughts 💭

[Ron Kuehn @RonCKuehn]

No because they have jobs

[Luke Beasley @lukepbeasley]

I’ll just leave this here

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

@NadejaVu_ You got this, babe

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

As if she needed another one, Ellie found a new finding spot in the apartment 🤦🏼‍♀️ I never would have noticed if I didn't see her crawling in there! She has her own little condo in the corner of the kitchen counters 😒😒😒

[James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn]

6-year-old: I love wearing pajamas all day.

Me: Everybody does.

6: Why do they even make other clothes?

[. @Btrillaaa]

The first one is the original video. Tiktok is fuckin hell I’m cryin😭😭😭

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

Like starfish!

[kelpcake @AshPashh1]

@jelliedew Dude. Same. So I thought “let me go to bed earlier, maybe I’m getting too much sleep” and I still woke up like 2 hours earlier; even today when I had to get up at 4:30 and went to bed past 10??? I just don’t get it!😒