Auguin

[Auguin @Auguin394]

We are so back

[Uncensored @SpeechUncut]

Pontius Pilate wanted to free Jesus. But he was pressured by the Israel Lobby.

[Conan Crave @Conan_Crave]

BREAKING: I fucked up I fucked up I was playing hide and seek with former late night host Conan O'Brien and I can't fucking find him please help please god fucking damn it I told him not to hide past the deli but he doesn't fucking listen what if he ran out of the store oh my god

[Auguin @Auguin394]

@unusual_whales That is not true. I had a coworker who was a lifer at my level. He worked there for 10 years and was constantly denied promotions and due to us being commission we never got raises. He left for a year and re-applied when the current manager quit and was instantly hired as manager

[octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman]

George Straight: All my exes live in Texas

George Gay: All my exes live in Texas and they’re all guys.

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

whatever… go my scallop

[leah @goneb4urhome]

That first peppermint mocha of the season

[hyperholy @stiiizysmoked]

i definitely would have said no to her but he’s kinda gay for even reporting this

[C3 @Igetjeeted333]

我从来不害怕潜水。 🇨🇳

[MEJE ✪ @callmeMEJE]

🐵 "DON'T TOUCH MY BABY"
🐵 "Oh, let me help you with those things"

[Blank: The Search for a Subtitle @m3tro_gn0me]

Me when I get on the wrong train in Barcelona and end up in Tramenda, Spain

[Middle Class Mr Burns @MrBurnsLovesYou]

Me in your ear during missionary

[Noah @BwuhMG]

"How hung can an auctioneer be?"
This guy:

[ReposterPoster of #TruthPoopTWT @DiddyPlier]

When it finally gets a bit cold outside and all the bugs go back to hell where they belong and you're just a saucy albino gorilla like

[Sebastian Ი𐑼⋆ DOLRP @Bunboyswag]

how do i turn off these stupid alerts