u call her toxic now.
but u met her when she was kind, open, trusting. before the lies. before the betrayal. before she had to protect herself from u. she became guarded because u kept hurting her, reactive because u kept crossing line. she became tired because she kept choosing u while u chose yourself. that wasn’t toxicity, that was damage. and expecting her to stay soft after everything u put her through is the real denial.
you changed her, then blamed her?
Everybody wants to be in a relationship for years but everybody is not ready for the the bad days, the crying, arguments, communication going wrong. Relationships aren’t fairytales & it’s not easy. If you love each other, you have to stay solid through it all and make it work.
Your partner coming to you about something you’ve done wrong isn’t a personal attack. It’s a healthy sign they value the relationship and want to make it work – it's a heads up. You communicate, you fix it, you stay. That's emotional maturity. That's commitment. That's love.
I love my job, but i miss having more time to see my friends/family and just being energized after work to call and talk to friends… but I’m emotionally exhausted by the end of the work day… It just makes me feel like a shitty friend.