Joe Hyam

Educator/Musician “Hey you with the pretty face! Welcome to the human race.”

[SLT Newbie @NewbieSlt]

Hi all,
Due to a shortage of specialist MFL teachers, we are looking at hiring some teachers from abroad. We will get around the visa thing by getting them to do Zoom lessons from their own countries. The children doing GCSE Chinese will have to arrive at 3am on Monday.
Thanks x

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

@RedFocus5 @PaulGarvey4 Hi
I think I’ve made it visible.
Thanks for the help guys :)

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

@PaulGarvey4 or anyone in the #edutwitter
Should I be expected to complete exam access arrangement assessments, applications and subsequent admin work on a basic teaching assistant contract? (Grade 3 SCP 6)
Thanks in advance :)

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

@PaulGarvey4 Thank you Paul :)
Much appreciated

[SLT Newbie @NewbieSlt]

Hi all,
We have a new cover supervisor. This one is perfect for the job. He is friendly, young, good looking, has his own Twinkle, Disney Plus and Netflix accounts, and a rucksack full of Haribos and single use vapes.
Thanks x
#behaviourmanagement

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

Murder and attempted murder should get the exact same time in prison. You shouldn't get less time inside just because you're shit at murdering.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

My scanner should not be demanding software updates. I want it to do one job - scan paper. The same thing I needed scanners to do 10 years ago. No improvement needed. Does my toaster need updates? No. It knows its job. Just scan you bastard.

[Sydney Jensen @sydneycjensen]

Ok, so I understand the "teachers should dress like a professional if they want to be treated and paid like one" argument BUT Y'ALL it literally has been over a hundred years and that hasn't worked, so what if we just wore jeans.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

Punched the air at hearing neighbour's son's GCSE results. She sent her son privately at cost of almost £20k/year. My son went to local comp. For 5 years, she's lauded how amazing the private school is. Results day: my son has gained a better result in every subject. Result

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

It must get boring being a scripted TV composer, repeating all the same tricks and tropes. Someone sneaking around? Double bass. Someone enjoying nature or greeting people in the street? Lydian mode. And a third example, and further examples.

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

When I go into the office in the mornings and put my ID pass lanyard around my neck, I like to think I'm awarding myself a little medal for turning up for another day of boring work.

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

It’s an interesting article and education does need a shake up. However it could be risky to legitimise withdrawing from whatever problems life throws your way.
We run the risk of an anti-social generation with little resilience. https://t.co/RPXyoVMaOy

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

Aged 53, I like to think of myself as something of a farting expert. My 13 year old read that on average people fart 10-20 times a day and so we have been counting. Obviously keen to get my numbers up and beat him, I've just shat myself.

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

Excellent article

[Tom Rogers @RogersHistory]

A fantastic article. I agree with every single word.

'Many children have internalised the mistaken idea that good mental health means feeling good all the time. But discomfort is not a problem to be solved, it is a necessary part of life we must all learn to willingly endure.'

[Joe Hyam @AverageJoeHyam]

Being alive is just really cool isn’t it?
We’re on a rock hurtling round a star through space and there’s coffee and birds singing and nice people and all sorts of great stuff.

[AMGFamily63 @AMGFamily63]

Teenager wants to earn pocket money for a PS5. He goes door to door in an Atlanta suburb to offer to help with gardening. Some residents get scared and call the police. The officer talks to the boy and he explains why he is looking for a job. The police officer, also a big gaming fan, raises money for a PS5. This is what then happens a few days later 👇 @CityofHapeville 💙❤️

@thedogman_918 @DB_Dogboy @Chappers2013 #Hapeville @PSAbsHussain #police @DavidDjt0311

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

When I buy a meal deal, I purposefully buy the three most expensive items so I feel like I've got the best deal possible. Sometime I don't even like it.

[Katharine Birbalsingh @Miss_Snuffy]

We sell brick phones in our school office at a loss.

Parents can still text/call kid but kid does not have unsupervised access to the internet.

Crucial difference

Kid safer cause he won’t get mugged and he won’t meet undesirables online.

Brain also not broken. Win win.👍🏽

[Brian Cox @ProfBrianCox]

I keep being asked what I make of the UFO thing in Congress yesterday, so here it is: I watched a few clips and saw some people who seemed to believe stuff saying extraordinary things without presenting extraordinary evidence. Therefore I have nothing more to say, other than: It would be great if true - it would take a bit of the pressure off our civilisation if we weren’t the only means within the Milky Way by which the Universe understands itself. Sadly, as of today, I still feel that pressure, so can we perhaps focus on not messing our world up rather than hoping that, to paraphrase Sagan, someone will float down to save us from ourselves.