Hebs

Just ravin

[Hebs @BChebs]

I forced a bot to watch every Seinfeld episode and write a script. Here’s the first page:

[Hebs @BChebs]

@ShinMadero PRG wyncote is 🔥🔥🔥

[Hebs @BChebs]

@Rufeelingrandy all the time

[Hebs @BChebs]

Zero clue why I made a note of “Shania Twain” with no additional text on April 13th, but it must be important somehow so I’m keepin it 🤷🏻‍♂️

[Hebs @BChebs]

@okaygallele It’s basically like college, attendance isn’t technically mandatory, as long as you submit a verdict on time you should be good

[Hebs @BChebs]

@_Od26

[Hebs @BChebs]

a Christopher Nolan movie about an IRS agent trying to track down someone who didn’t pay their taxes and it turns out to be him

[Hebs @BChebs]

@soda_enjoyer Infinite money glitch!

[Hebs @BChebs]

Not sure I wanna know what’s in a “Lowe’s Surprise” 😳

[Hebs @BChebs]

People will shit on the Aztecs for doing human sacrifice, but forget the most American tradition (Black Friday) also involves human sacrifice (trample to death in a Walmart) to ensure a bountiful harvest (more TV’s at a $5 discount).

[Hebs @BChebs]

People boutta spend $8 a month and all they’re gonna get is this image spammed in their replies lmao

[Hebs @BChebs]

Homie doing an RPG playthrough where he always chooses the wackiest option in the dialogue tree

[Hoop Central @TheHoopCentral]

"You'll be playing with LeBron James and Anthony Davis."

Pat Bev: "They're gonna be playing with me. I made the playoffs last year, they didn't.”

(h/t @ClutchPointsApp)

[Hebs @BChebs]

@okaygallele Take all the time you need 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[Hebs @BChebs]

My favorite summer activity? Hoppin in the whip, windows down, bass turned all the way up, absolutely BLASTING the traffic report while sitting in bumper-to-bumper on I-95 🔥😎

[Hebs @BChebs]

Airlines be like “imma soft launch this flight cancellation with a 3 hour delay first” 😩😭

[Hebs @BChebs]

@JimboExotic Bro that’s rough. I’m not actually in ORLY though 🤢 I’m in ORELAND 😩😩😩 long story short, I had to tweet that for extra points in a game my friend was GM-ing.
Reading the one star reviews for that airport was a treat tho

[Hebs @BChebs]

ORLY Airport? More like BARELY an AIRPORT! There’s like no one here! This place is beat 😡

[Hebs @BChebs]

Been almost six years and these tweets are still relevant lmao

[Hebs @BChebs]

@mcnamara_shane Nah, my car still runs in eucalyptus, which is both inefficient and unethical but ya know, give me a break! Gotta take one step at a time!

[Hebs @BChebs]

Pleased to announce I have become carbon neutral. My body runs purely on vibes now.