adebola

A woman with a love for God, His truth and a passion for wholesome women

[adebola @BFaps]

Humility doesn't come from having less to be proud of.

It comes from having enough inner security that you don't need to prove anything.

Pride, on the other hand, is usually covering for something that feels missing.

What are you covering up in the bid to prove yourself?

[adebola @BFaps]

Reflection: You only get the one life.
Not a draft, not a rehearsal and not even a re-run.
Every day spent unhappy, unfulfilled, unproductive is a day you don't get back.
Ask yourself: If life truly is this short, what am I still tolerating that I don't have to?

[adebola @BFaps]

Reflection: You can't lose direction you never had.

Feeling like you've lost the plot is, strangely, proof you had one.

It's a sign you were oriented, purposeful, moving somewhere.

Could this feeling of being lost actually be proof that you had direction to begin with?

[adebola @BFaps]

Can you love God and still struggle with your mental health?

[adebola @BFaps]

Most relational conflicts come from an unconscious ranking whereby you treat your own perspective as the default and everyone else's as insignificant.

Ask yourself: Where have I been treating my perspective as the default, rather than one perspective among equally valid others?

[adebola @BFaps]

You were built to move.

Fear doesn't stop that, it just adds weight until movement feels impossible.

Put the weight down, and notice how much of that heaviness was never actually yours to carry.

Ask yourself: What would feel light again if I finally set the fear down?

[adebola @BFaps]

You don't stall because the task is too big.

You stall because some part of you doubts you're the one who can do it.

Fix the belief, and watch how quickly the delay disappears.

Ask yourself: Is this really a time management problem or is it more a believing problem?

[adebola @BFaps]

A lot of relationship pain comes from expecting someone to be a version of themselves they've never actually shown you. Frustration builds when we keep negotiating with reality instead of accepting it.

Are you frustrated with who they are, or with who you wish they were?

[adebola @BFaps]

It rarely announces itself. It shows up in smaller forms. First by dismissing someone's reality, controlling their choices, withholding care as leverage.

Ask yourself: Is there a smaller version of control or dismissal in my relationships that I've been minimizing?

[adebola @BFaps]

Recognising your neighbour has feelings, thoughts, ideas, values, that are equally as important as your own is where real connection starts.

Ask yourself: Where have I been treating my perspective as the default, rather than one perspective among equally valid others?

[adebola @BFaps]

Kindness and people-pleasing get confused constantly.
One is generosity; the other is fear
You can hold real care for someone without the responsibility of their emotional reaction
Ask yourself: Where have I been managing someone else's feelings instead of just being honest?

[adebola @BFaps]

"Follow your heart" isn't the whole instruction. Your heart still needs to be checked against what you actually believe — otherwise you're just following an impulse and calling it conviction.

Ask yourself: Is my heart aligned with my values, or just what I want right now?

[adebola @BFaps]

The difference isn't dramatic on any single day — it's cumulative. Every choice you hand over, out of fear or convenience, is a small vote for existing instead of living.

Ask yourself: Where in my life am I existing instead of choosing?

[adebola @BFaps]

Both are a lens, not a fact. The gap you're staring at and the resource you're standing on are often the same situation — you just haven't decided which one to build with yet.

Ask yourself: What do I already have that I've been too focused on lacking something else to use well?

[adebola @BFaps]

The hardest opponent most people face isn't out there — it's the doubt, the old story, the internal argument that shows up.

Win that one first.

Ask yourself: What's the internal battle I keep having with myself before I even get to the external one?

[adebola @BFaps]

Rejection isn't the end of the story

Getting a no isn't the end of your story - it is only a moment in time.

That no however becomes the final word if you stop trying.

Ask yourself: What rejection have I let feel bigger and more final than it actually was?

[adebola @BFaps]

You can't grow toward a version of yourself you haven't taken the time to actually see.

Self-improvement without self-awareness is just motion and not direction.

How much of who you are today is a choice — and how much is a habit you never examined?

[adebola @BFaps]

Self-worth built on output is only as stable as the output itself.

When the job ends, the money dips, or the achievement doesn't come, the person underneath doesn't disappear.

What would you still believe about yourself if every external marker of success was gone tomorrow?

[adebola @BFaps]

If approval isn't guaranteed either way, it's worth being disliked as yourself rather than disliked as a performance you're maintaining for nothing.

Ask yourself: Who am I still performing for, even though it isn't guaranteeing their approval anyway?

[adebola @BFaps]

Curating only your best angle for other people is exhausting, and it quietly implies the rest of you needs hiding.

It doesn't.

Ask yourself: What part of myself have I been keeping out of view, assuming it wasn't acceptable?