Brian Simms

Raised by a pack of wolves, orphaned at 6, wrote his first critically acclaimed novel at age 11, performed the first no-handed pushup at 13, first Tweet at 21

[Big Cat @BarstoolBigCat]

Joey Chestnut just told me the buns are looking real fast today, no idea what that means but I'm excited #LetTheBigCatEat

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

She founded Make A Wish, has a net worth of 3.2 billion, designed the Philippine Peso. #MostInterestingWoman #WFUgrad

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Good morning from Wake Forest. Excited to see Kelli graduate today! #WFUgrad #nofilter #Ithink

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Right across from a two hundred year old Franciscan pub, this view sucks. #B&B #breakfast&beer

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

So I have officially found the single greatest bar in the entire state of Oklahoma #Jesusdidnttap #Ididnteither

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

"What ethnicity is Genghis Khan? He's that Korean guy right?" @ashvblack #TriviaCrack #HistoryBuff

[Tanner Tiedeman @Tee_Da_Man]

Someday, a super proud dad will tell his kid: "See that shark dancing behind Katy Perry? That was me in my glory days."

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Celebrating my first Sunday Funday with someone who apparently doesn't have a Twitter #JessB #getatwitter

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Grandpa is throwin a party in his room, parking's a bitch though #notveryfast #mildlyfurious

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Quietly playing Christmas songs while in the background "DAD YOU'RE USING TOO MUCH BUTTER! ITS EVERYWHERE!" #peaceful

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Pretty well sums up the tailgating yesterday @willMcamp @livkintigh

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Newton's 4th Law: One cannot drive the posted speed limit if said driver is listening to B.O.B. by Outkast #officeryoudontunderstand

[William Campbell @willMcamp]

"Uh yes, I'll have 8 royal intercourses." -@ashvblack's dad

[Justin Timberlake @jtimberlake]

What a speech @KDTrey5. You are a class act, my dude! Congratulations on a well deserved MVP award.

[Riley Blaine Nolan @rnolan66]

America will learn someday. #OklaHOMEa

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

That Adams swat and Durant dunk though

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Apparently my nurse isn't "legally" able to write me for a week off of work even though I just got 2 immunization shots... Thanks Obama

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

@camille_nassar o my lanta, what is up good lookin kids! #blushonblushonblush

[Brian Simms @BSimmsy]

Every time I see this this, I fantasize about hittin' it at high speed and launching off #heywatchthis #holdmybeer